“Mom, what about gifts? I can’t seem to come up with any ideas.”
“Ah, I know the perfect thing. Most of the older sisters, as I understand, will soon be graduating soon; how about Hermes notebooks?”
“Mom, those things are almost two grand a piece.” I should know because she’d saddled me with one as if the iPad dad was forever upgrading for me wasn’t enough.
“Oh, it’s no bother; it’s the impression you’d make, the statement if you will. Oh, this is so exciting.” Good Lord, what have I done?
“Mom, mom, calm down!” I laughed at her prattling on and on.
“But when are you planning to have this party? I’ll get those invitations and thank you cards out to you pronto.”
“Thanks, mom, and I guess you can hold off on sending the calling cards.”
“Whyever for?”
“Well, there isn’t much room in the dorm to socialize, so when the sisters want to get together, it’s usually at one of their places. There wouldn’t be much use for them now, would they?” I laughed it off as if that wasn’t the main reason for my calling.
“Well! Have you been making many friends, Leese?” Oh, I know I’ve got her now; she’s breaking out the pet name.
“Oh yes, most of the sisters and I get along splendidly.”
“Most of them?” And here we head over to the next reason for my call. I just might spend a few days in purgatory for my behavior.
“Well, there’s this one girl who doesn’t seem to like me very much, but you can’t please everyone, right.”
“Oh? Why doesn’t she like you? Who is she? Has she been mean to you?” No mom, this is not kindergarten. As much as mom wouldn’t let me face down my bullies in the past, I knew it wasn’t because of any weakness on her part.
Mom just has this old-world view on how a lady should comport herself. I guess I got my vengeful streak from dad because now that the training wheels were off, I was having way too much fun thinking up ways of destroying the enemy.
“I don’t know why she doesn’t like me. As to who she is, I think her dad’s a senator, and her mom’s a lobbyist.”
“Oh? And what’s their family name Leese?”
“Powell, I think.”
“Hmm! But you get along fine with the others?”
“Of course, that’s why I’m thinking of having a soiree.” I let her mull that over for a bit. Knowing her, she’s already planning a call or, at the very least, setting grandma’s henchmen on an information hunt on every Powell in the phone book. Mom’s idea of how a lady should deal with the enemy is never full-frontal combat; she might break a nail, heaven forbid. But she can use those million-dollar words she’d learned at grandma’s knee and that megawatt smile to perfection. Dad loves to watch her in action, so I guess there must be something to it.
“So, anyway, back to the calling cards, you don’t need to send them at this time since the dorm isn’t a good place for house calls.”
“If there’s no room there, where do you plan on having your soiree?” I gave her the name of the hotel, knowing she’d approve. It’s where she and dad stayed the one hundred times she’d made him visit the school before letting me set foot there.
“Your father has been making noises about coming out that way in a couple of weeks or so; maybe we’d look around and see if there’s anything we like. But you have to promise to be careful and take Jess with you when you move. That’s the only way I’ll sign off on something like that.”
I’m way ahead of you, mom. I’ve already picked a place out, and there’s more than enough room for Cody, Jess, and Alexis to join me. Wait, did she say when you move? When not if. I did a little jig on the sidewalk; don’t judge. Mind you, mom has no idea about Cody’s existence, but that’s for another time.
Dad, on the other hand, although he hasn’t come right out and asked, must have a pretty good idea of how serious I am about him. All he’d said in a roundabout way was to have fun and be careful after asking a million questions about him, none of which were what I could expect from mom when the time came.
He was stuck on Cody playing football while keeping up his GPA and the fact that Cody cared so much about his mom and dad. I guess it didn’t hurt that he’d been in contact with my new in-laws and had a good impression of them, which is all good for me because I’m going to need him when I finally break the news to mom two minutes before Cody’s and my wedding in about ten years or so.