“I’m fine with whatever.” I’m amazed I got those few words past the lump in my throat. I guess I have mom to thank for my gaucheness. For me, not knowing what to do here and now. I felt like one wrong move, and I would jump right out of my skin.
“So, Lisa, tell me about yourself; where are you from?”
“A little place called Potomac Manors, it’s in Maryland.” Dumb, he didn’t ask for your address, just a general location.
“A southern girl, huh!”
“I guess, and you?”
“Me, I’m a good old Yankee from the state of New Jersey.”
“How do you like it here so far?” I started to shrug in my usual way but caught him looking at me and thought it best if I participated in the conversation. He could have no idea how hard this was for me. Even though we were only exchanging pleasantries, things most normal humans do on the regular, I was petrified of saying the wrong thing.
He didn’t seem to mind my one-word answers, or if he did, he didn’t mention it, but I was beginning to get annoyed with myself. It’s true that I’ve been sheltered all my life, but there’s no reason for me to be this skittish. As the saying goes, you have to start somewhere, sometime.
With that thought in mind, I decided to salvage what was left of the evening and try to at least act like I had some sense in my head. I didn’t have to dance on the table naked to impress him; I hadn’t done anything to impress him in the first place, had I?
I lectured myself silently while he and I were having a conversation, ever conscious of my every word and his every move. It was hard not to stare at him because he truly was gorgeous, but so as not to appear like the green bean I was, I did it out of the side of my eye while pretending to enjoy the scenery outside the truck.
We pulled into the parking lot of a red brick building with green shutters and lanterns in the windows. It looked like one of those quaint, out-of-the-way places you see in the movies. As he helped me out of the truck, I realized that I was on my first official date.
After the angst and turmoil in my tummy settled down, maybe I could enjoy that fact. He took my hand and walked us to the door, where the hostess greeted us and showed us to a cozy table in the corner overlooking the water, which I had missed from the lot.
“This is nice.” I looked around nervously at the other diners before settling my eyes on him again. “It’s my mother’s favorite place whenever she visits.” He smiled fondly, and I saw another side to the campus hunk. There was a boyish air about him when he spoke of his mom.
“Does she come here often?” He played with the stem of his water glass after the busser placed it on the table. “She used to before…not now; I’ll tell you all about that some other time. Tonight we get to know more about each other, okay.”
“Okay.” The server interrupted us just then and offered us menus. I saw the same look on her face as I had on the hostess's, and they were both pretty. It got a bit uncomfortable sitting here knowing that he could do better, and just like that, the evening was ruined.
“Hey, where did you go?” He touched my hand, and I looked up at him.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yeah, you do. The light just went out of your eyes.” Wow, seriously?
“Um, I’m not sure what you mean.” I paid very close attention to the pattern on the table cloth as I felt his eyes on me. I knew it was too good to be true. He’s going to find an excuse to call off the evening, and I can’t say that I blame him. It’s obvious he could have anyone he wanted, so why would someone like him waste his time with an inexperienced rube like me?
“Lisa, can I ask you a question? Look at me.” I lifted my head, hoping he couldn’t see how close to tears I was.
“Do I make you uncomfortable, baby?” I think it was the endearment that did it—either that or the tenderness in his voice when he asked.
“No-no, it’s not that it’s just...” And it all came tumbling out. Like a ninny, I sat there and gave him a condensed version of my, until now nonexistent, dating life. He sat in silence and listened until I wound down in embarrassment after my profound case of word vomit. He didn’t say anything for the longest time, and I was sure he was about to get up and say, let’s go.