“I was terrified when those guards threw me in here, and I wassoangry at you. I-I was mad at myself, too. It was foolish of me to trust you so easily, to believe you when you said you wouldn’t.” I paused, feeling uncomfortably vulnerable under his intense gaze. “But I appreciated you sending Thana with the note. I don’t think I would’ve survived being trapped in here.”
I couldn’t tell him it was alright, that I forgave him. He had kidnapped me, and that single event changed the trajectory of my entire life.
I wanted it to be okay, but it wasn’t. I wasn’t. I had barely been able to breathe as things piled up—surprising me, devastating me, rewriting my life and everything I thought I knew.
But there was still that small part of me that recognized if he hadn’t kidnapped me, I would still be in Auryna. Still unhappy with life and full of empty dreams. Probably married to Finn by now, moved into his home, where he would’ve expected me to take on the duties of a wife. A mother. I internally cringed at the thought.
But at least my own mother would be alive.
And that is why guilt bit at me every second of the day, lying in wait in the back of my mind. Because while Rogue insisted it wasn’t my fault, it was.
He may have been the one to kidnap me, but I, quite literally, ran into his arms.
He did what he did for the safety of his people. I did what I did in selfishness. Because I stupidly wanted a small taste of freedom, to decide something for myself.
My heart wrenched and I turned my face to the fire before he could see the agony in my eyes. He crossed the room, sitting in the chair adjacent to mine. There we sat in silence until well after sunset, both lost in our thoughts.
I started to nod off when Rogue muttered, “I wish it had been me.”
I lifted my head to look at him. His gaze was still locked on the fire, the flickering orange reflected in his dark eyes.
“What do you mean?” I whispered.
“I wish it had been me that was sent away.”
My breath hitched slightly, quietly, as a lump formed in my throat.
“What a pair we are,” I mumbled, lying my head back down on my elbow.
“Indeed. What a broken pair.”
* * *
As we exited the stairwell the next morning, Doran and Delphia entered through the front doors.
“Well, long time, no see,” Rogue shouted, a wide grin splitting his face as he quickly descended the stairs.
Delphia ran to me and I froze as she threw her arms around me.
“I amsohappy to see you’re still alive! Although, I wouldn’t think Rogue would let you go that easily,” she teased, laughing. “It’s good to see you again.”
“I’m glad to see you are well,” Doran said with a smile, dipping his head in greeting.
“So, tell us about the people. How are they doing?” Rogue asked and the mood shifted, the light tone draining from the room.
“It seems there haven’t been any attacks since Ara’s kidnapping, which is good news of course, but…” He paused, sighing. “It seems they have amassed an army along the border. Onourside of the border, in the abandoned border towns.”
Rogue’s mouth set in a tight line. I vaguely heard his knuckles crack as Doran continued.
“They’ve been there for a few days at least, but haven’t moved forward yet.”
“How much time do we have?” Rogue asked, his words quick and clipped.
“If they were to mobilize tomorrow, it would take them a few weeks to move that many men all the wayhere, maybe two or three, but—”
“They would pass through too many towns on the way. We need to start recruitingnow,” Rogue said, striding towards the front door. Doran didn’t move. “Assemble your commanders immediately. We need to call a—”
“Rogue, wait. There’s one more thing.” Doran took a quick breath, lifting his eyes as Rogue stopped in his tracks. “There has been word that a person has been born with the gift of manipulation.”