"If I am to call you Philip, then you should be calling me Letitia."
"I thought I was to call you Letty, as we are friends."
"And now you are my husband," I remind him.
"Is that less than friends? Weren't you the one to say that we should enter this marriage on friendly terms?" There seems to be something akin to hope in his tone, but I don't want to fool myself into believing something that isn't true just because I wish for it to be.
I let out a loud sigh. "I do not know. This is new to me and not something I am prepared for. I believed you felt the same way as I about marriage,but you seem to have taken to it much more easily."
Surprise flits over his face. "I suppose I have taken to it more than I expected," he agrees. "Though I feel as if we are more strangers to one another now we live in the same house, than before."
"Perhaps we should change that," I suggest, my voice coming out barely above a whisper.
Philip reaches out and takes my hand in his. "I would like that."
Something akin to relief settles within me, though I am unsure about what is causing it. Perhaps it is simply the knowledge that I am not married to someone who does not wish to know me, though that should not be a surprise. We spent time together before we were caught alone, and he always seemed to be genuinely interested in what I had to say.
"Do you like the opera?" Philip asks. "I should have thought to ask you before we arrived."
"I enjoy it," I assure him. "Though I prefer classical recitals. There is something serene about the way the music is played that I enjoy."
He nods. "I have never thought about it like that. I shall enquire about tickets on the morrow."
"You don't have to do that."
"I wish to." He smiles at me. "I wish ourmarriage to be a happy one, do you not want the same?"
"Of course."
"Then allow me to do this for you. And anything else you desire. You should inform me of anything you wish for. And the name of your modiste, I should like to have an account set up for you."
"The Countess already set up an appointment with her dressmaker." Unfortunately. While I expressed that I wished to use the modiste who has been making my dresses for years, she did not seem particularly pleased by the notion.
"Would you not prefer to use your own?"
"I would," I agree. "But the Countess was firm in her decision."
"Then we will have to be firm in yours," Philip responds. "You must go to your modiste this week and set up an account. I will speak with the steward in order to give you access to the money you will need for your other expenses and needs. I know you are going to tell me it is unnecessary to do so, but that is simply not the case. It will become tedious to you beyond measure if you have to search out someone else in the household any time you wish to spend a small sum."
"Thank you." I glance down at my hands, the glittering wedding ring catching the light andreminding me that this is my reality now, and that I am lucky to have someone who seems to wish to be attentive to my needs, even if it is not the epic love I wished to find in years to come.
"You have never told me what you enjoy doing when you are not attending balls and events," he says.
"I like to draw," I say. "Though Mother was never particularly impressed when I came to dinner with charcoal staining my fingers. Nor when the servants complained that it stained the insides of my gloves."
"It seems that having gloves of a darker colour would solve that particular problem."
"Ah, but it would introduce the problem of being unfashionable," I counter. "And that would be seen as even less desirable."
"I can see how that might be an issue."
"It is. And now even more so. I know you wish for me to be able to stand up for myself against your mother, but I don't believe the Countess will stand for anything she deems to be unfashionable."
"I fear you may be right there," he responds. "But in time, you'll be the Countess and can make your own rules."
"The current Earl seems to be in excellenthealth, and I wouldn't want to wish any misfortune on him," I say.
Philip smiles at me. "Which gives us the perfect amount of time to work out exactly what we want to be when we're in their positions."