“Well, only if you dressed up in that Halloween outfit again,” I said, teasing.
“You’re funny,” she said, sounding closer, so I turned around. “Here.”
Standing there, in her now bare feet, holding a glass of fake wine, I smiled. She looked so comfortable and confident, and it made me want her even more ferociously. “It’s only eleven fifteen, still have forty-five minutes until the New Year.”
She sipped her drink. “We’ll toast then, too,” she said, smiling. “Right now, we’re…toasting my first step into a bar. Next up…we’ll see.”
I wove my free arm around her waist. “College campus. We’ve got five months to get you there for graduation.”
“I was thinking next was…being close with you.”
“Oh. I’ll take that.” I pulled her flush with me. “You’re the driver, Lina. We can stop any time you want.”
She pressed her body against me. I ducked down and got in her line of sight to see how she was doing. She smiled, and I couldn’t help but claim her mouth. Still holding my wineglass, I pulled her closer with my free hand as I begged entrance to her mouth.
She was so soft and timid with the kiss it reminded me of her fragility, and I slowed things down. Our tongues caressed, teased as the seconds turned into minutes and could have tumbled into hours for all I cared. I could kiss her all night.
And I would if she’d let me.
“Couch,” she whispered into my mouth.
I disconnected with her, and she nodded to the side and held up her glass. “I want both hands free.”
She didn’t have to tell me twice. I grabbed her glass and set them on the coffee table, then guided her to sitting on the couch. Her wonder-filled eyes scanned over my body, and she drew in a sharp breath and glanced to the side.
“It’s okay, Lina. Only as far as you want. I just can’t shut my body down. You’re so sexy. Don’t be scared.”
“Can I…see more of you?”
“As much as you want.” I sat on the coffee table before her and nudged her chin up so I could see her clearly. “I’m yours, Lina, and I want you. I want this. But only what you’re comfortable with.”
“Sex?”
“Someday, yes. Tonight…let’s enjoy each other. No pressure. I want to learn you, Lina.” I leaned forward and pressed a promising kiss to her mouth. She reached out and grabbed my face, holding me steady as she took it deeper.
“I love you. You’re so patient.” She kissed my eyelids and leaned back. “And I think I’m ready to show you something. Before…well, you’re going to see it anyway.”
She closed her eyes and let out a long breath as she reached for her other hand. Slowly unsnapping the leather band around her wrist.
Even in the dim light I saw the mark right away, and I bit back the urge to flinch at the raised scars. She reached for the other wrist and did the same thing, yielding the same results.
“I…didn’t want you to be surprised.” She laid out her hands, wrists exposed, on my thighs.
“Lina,” I whispered. Unable to think of anything to say I grabbed her right hand and brought her wrist to my mouth. Slowly I brushed my lips along the scar, never taking my eyes from her. I kissed the inside of her palm then set her hand down so I could do the same thing to her other one.
She watched me with a close eye, and I knew she was waiting for my reaction. Maybe watching to see if I was repulsed, disgusted or if I would turn her away.
I knew all too well about momentary weakness. She’d tried to take her own life in hers, and I ended a life in mine. I wouldn’t judge her. Never.
She’d tried to kill herself, even did it the right direction by running up her vein rather than across her wrist.
“When?” I said now holding both her hands in mine.
“Couple of years ago. Stupid moment. Totally wasted on sedatives and depressed.”
She’d been a shut-in by then, alone with no one checking on her. “How’d you survive?”
“Lizzie called Jenna because I wasn’t answering at our scheduled time. She knew I was in a bad place. Jenna alerted hotel security and a medical team. They busted down my door.” She shook her head. “Enough about that. I just…didn’t want to surprise you.”