Texts from my parents, my friends, Amber, Tyler and Lucian. My hand shakes as my phone pings continually. I switch it to silent when my bedroom door swings open, and I scream, letting out every emotion inside me.
“Jesus Christ, Chelsea, it’s me!” Warm arms surround me, but they do nothing to stop the emotion pouring out. “Chelsea, it’s me.”
I recognise the voice to be Tyler’s, recognise his touch, his scent and his warmth. My scream is soon replaced by sobs, and for the first time in a long time, I release all my broken pieces. I allow myself to be seen for the broken mess I have become. For years I have bottled up the damage my parents caused, bottled up the damage my ex-boyfriend caused when he burnt down my shop, and bottled up every negative that life has thrown at me. I’ve bottled so much up that to the outside world I look like a fully functioning adult, but on the inside, I’ve been barely keeping it together. Since losing Lucian it has all become too much and I can’t bottle it up any more.
Tyler doesn’t say a word, and it’s better that way. He holds me and lets me release all the pain I’m feeling.
I’m not sure how much time passes, but slowly, I pull out of Tyler’s embrace. He looks like the same old Tyler, except with a slightly fuller face and a natural tan.
“I take it it didn’t work with Mason?” My throat is so sore that my words come out in short gasps.
Tyler shrugs. “It happens. I guess it didn’t work out with Lucian?”
My lower lip trembles, and sinking down on the bed, I tell him everything from start to finish.
Tyler jumps up. “Josh, that scheming bastard. I’ll kill him,” he declares, heading toward the door.
I stumble to my feet and run after him. I pull on the sleeve of his jacket and yank him back. “Getting into a fight with Josh won’t solve anything.”
Tyler pulls his arm free and flicks his hair back. “Perhaps, but it would make me feel a damn sight better.” Tyler rolls his eyes when my expression remains unchanged. “Come on, darlin’, I’ll buy us breakfast.” He links his arm with mine and pulls me toward the door. The room spins faster the closer we get to the hallway. Suddenly the idea of leaving the flat feels too daunting.
“Tyler, get off me,” I say, and pull back.
“I know you don’t eat breakfast, but I can get you an extra-strong coffee.”
“Tyler, get off me,” I repeat. My heartbeat is erratic when he opens the door.
“We need to tell Amber you’re back. She’s been calling me non-stop since—”
“Get off me!” I yell, and, snatching my arm free, I run into the kitchen and grab the bottle of antibacterial spray. With eczema-covered hands, I spray and scrub the worktop. “I can’t leave, I have to clean, have to clean.”
Tyler enters the kitchen and, folding his arms, stands watching me. “Lizzie is getting married tomorrow.”
I shake my head vehemently. “I can’t leave the flat, I can’t leave.”
We break eye contact when the ringtone sounds from an incoming call. Tyler pulls his phone from his pocket and looks at the screen. “It’s your sister.”
“Don’t answer,” I say, scrubbing harder now.
Tyler accepts the call and holds the phone to his ear. “Amber, darlin’. Yes, I am back in the UK.” Tyler turns his attention to me. “She isn’t back yet. Don’t worry, I will let you know the moment she is home.” He cuts the call, and his attention remains on his phone.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
Tyler taps the glass screen and holds the device to his ear. “I’m calling your therapist. I’m going to request an urgent home visit.”
I laugh. “I don’t need to see my therapist. I’m fine.”
Tyler shakes his head. “No, Chelsea, you are anything but fine.”
Lucian
“To us.” Josh clinks his glass against mine.
“To us,” I repeat, and swallow back my drink. Drinking brandy in my home office on a Saturday morning? Life doesn’t get much better than this, or at least that is what I’m telling myself.
The past two weeks have been a blur. Since Chelsea left, I have thrown myself into work. Every day I called her and left numerous messages, but she is completely unreachable. She may only have been in my life for just over a week, but in those few short days, I was truly happy. She filled a void in my world I didn’t know existed, and now she’s gone the void has only gotten bigger.
“May our efforts be rewarded in the meeting this afternoon,” Josh says. He swaggers around the large office space, plucks random non-fiction books from the built-in bookshelf and flicks through the pages, calling out arbitrary facts. It’s becoming slightly tedious, but from the way he’s struggling to stand still I know he’s nervous. His nerves are making me feel jittery, so I suggested a brandy to help take the edge off. But if anything, the alcohol has only added to his restlessness.