She turns to me then, brown eyes so trusting that I catch my breath.
“I know,” she says softly. “Me too.”
And the last remaining parts of my heart break at her words. Because she meant what she said. She doesn’t care about me, and I have to accept it and move on. I swallow what’s left of my dignity and open the door.
Every eye in the office is glued to Elisa as she walks out. “Nothing to see here,” I growl like an angry bear.
Most of my employees avert their eyes, but some still linger with curiosity. I give the stragglers a hard look until their heads snap back forwards, intent on their computer screens.
And after she’s gone, I walk back into my office and slam the door. How did my day go from amazing to a fucking disaster in less than an hour? Because when Elisa called me earlier, it was like a sign. Listen to that. Me, the big bad boss, believing in “signs” like some kooky teenage girl. But somehow, the woman’s turned me into a pile of mush because I didn’t realize that our encounter was going to lead to this. Me, spilling my heart out. Not just my heart, but my guts. And all of it trampled on and thrown back into my face like it was worth nothing.
Fuck me. Fuck this.
But I can’t blame the gorgeous girl for the situation. I did tell my employees they could walk in whenever they wanted. And Trevor usually just tells people to walk in unless he knows I’m busy. So it’s kind of the way things are always done around here.
But now there’s a fucking mess out there I need to deal with. Shit. A knock on my door stops me from spiraling into insanity.
“Come in,” I growl. Under my breath, I add, “Thanks for knocking.”
Pattie stands at the door looking at me askance. “Hey boss.”
Fuck this shit.
“How bad is it?”
She doesn’t say anything, which means it’s really bad.
“Goddamnit,” I curse.
Pattie holds up both hands palms out.
“It’s not as bad as it could be. We got a gag order on everyone before it spilled out of the building. At least social media won’t get a hold of this.”
“That’s good. What else?”
“The board is meeting in two weeks to talk about Elisa’s future with Cameron Publishing.”
“They can’t drop her book,” I say fiercely.
Pattie sits down. “They can if they want to. You know that. This isn’t a one-man dictatorship. Cameron Publishing runs according to rules that you set up as a precaution. You’ll have to convince them to change the guidelines about intraoffice dating.”
I laugh bitterly. “No, I don’t. It’s pointless. Elisa ended it so we no longer have a problem.”
“Oh shit,” Pattie gasps, one hand going up to clap over her mouth. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. It wasn’t a big thing.” Liar, liar, pants on fucking fire.
My editor sighs. “I’ve known you for a long time, Robert. I know you cared for her more than any of your other girlfriends.”
I partially glower.
“Says who?”
Pattie rolls her eyes.
“Come on, I’ve been here for five years. I know you, boss. I know how much you liked her. Anyone could tell, it wasn’t exactly subtle.”
Oh fuck.
“You’re right. I liked her. Key word being ‘liked’ and not like.”
“And she bailed?” Pattie asks, one eyebrow shooting towards the ceiling.
“She doesn’t feel the same,” I growl, hackles rising.
“Hmm,” Pattie says thoughtfully. “I would’ve thought she did with the way she looks at you. But maybe my radar is off.”
“Maybe,” I say, but her words give me hope. “Did you talk to Steven?” I ask abruptly. Steven is the head of the board.
“Yeah. He said to continue working on Elisa’s book for now. If we do keep her, we’ll have to stay on deadline anyway. If we drop her, this work will be for nothing, and we’ll have to eat the cost.”
“Shit,” I say. “Fuck shit fuck.”
Pattie shrugs. “At this point, it is what it is, boss. Not that they’re interested, but I’m definitely going to tell the board I want to keep the book.”
“You go to bat for the book,” I say. “I’ll wipe my hands of it.”
“But you love this story!” Pattie gasps.
“I do, but I like Elisa more, and if I have to step back to get her published, then that’s what I’ll do.”
Pattie just shakes her head again.
“Like I said, Mr. Cameron, you really like this woman. I’ve never seen you this go this ga-ga before. But we don’t have to make any decisions now. We have two weeks before the board meets, and we’ll come up with a game plan before then.”
I sit down at my desk with a heavy sigh. “I just don’t want to ruin Elisa’s life.”
“I know,” Pattie says comfortingly. “We’ll figure this out.”
I nod, and Pattie shoots me one last look of pity before leaving. Because Elisa may not like me, but my heart won’t stop wanting her. And if I can’t have her … the least I can do is to make her dreams come true.