She looks at me with the question hanging in her eyes.
“Lilly, how do you feel about all of this? Are you angry with me? I’m really sorry that I kept this a secret from you—it was just verycomplicated.”
“I’m not mad at you,” she says. “I understand that sometimes adults make mistakes too. I’m just glad that I know about all of it now.”
“You’re very wise,” I say to her. “Your mother would be very proud of you, and I have no doubt that you are going to make the very best big sister in the world. The babies are lucky to have you.”
“Does that mean that you are going to stay with us now?” she asks. “I really hope that we can all be a family now.”
My heart feels like it is swelling inside my chest, and for the first time since having moved here—hell, maybe for the first time in my whole life—I actually feel certain about what I want and where I belong. I get ready to answer her, but then something catches my eye, another person appears in the doorway.
“Dad!” Lilly says as she jumps up and goes to hug him.
He heard what she said. I can tell by the way he is staring at me. It’s the same way that he had been staring at me the night that I ran out of his house after Lilly had said a similar thing.
“Hi Lillybean,” he says as he gives his daughter a hug. “Lorna said you’ve been doing a great job spending time with the babies.”
“I have! But I haven’t spent as much time with my brother yet, so I was going to go and visit him in the nursery next.” She turns back to look at me before she leaves. “It would be a lot easier if you guys would give them names so that I could stop calling them justgirland boy or brother and sister. Although I do like that part. Having siblings that is.”
Chad laughs and nods his head.
“We’ll see what we can do about that.”
After Lilly leaves, Chad comes to sit down next to me and talk. It’s the firstrealconversation that we have had since our argument back in my cottage a lifetime ago. Everything, since he came to rescue me in my van up until now, has been a frenzy of chaos. Finally, the two of us have a quiet moment to talk about things.
“How are you feeling?” he asks.
“Sore, but okay. I don’t really know a lot of what has happened because I’ve been medicated most of the time.”
“That’s okay,” he says with a gentle smile as he reaches to hold my hand. “The only important thing to know is that you are okay and recovering and that the babies are doing well and getting stronger every day.”
“Even our daughter?”
He nods and I feel as though the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders.
“She’s going to be just fine. We might need to get her some smaller clothes until she puts some weight on her,” he chuckles. “But other than that, she is absolutely perfect in every way.”
The way he says “we” sets the groundwork for the rest of our conversation.
“I heard what Lilly said, and she's right. I want us all to be a family too. I won’t try to force you to do anything you don't want. But I should have told you a long time ago, Seraphine, that I love you. I love you so much that I can't even think about my life without you in it. I'm sorry that I acted like such a jerk before. I guess I was trying to run away from something before I got hurt again. But it was stupid, and I pushed you away instead.”
I can feel the tears start to sting at the corners of my eyes.
“I want you to stay here in Asheville and live with us. I want us all to be in one home as a family, and I want to be with you forever. What do you say? Will you give me another chance?”
I try to be funny and lighten the mood because otherwise, I'm going to be swallowed up by emotion.
“Is this your way of asking me to go on another date with you?” I tease.
Chad laughs and leans over to cup my face in his hands as he kisses me. My attempt at poking a hole in the emotional intensity didn't work, because we both start to cry. At least these are tears of happiness this time. We are all together, I am done running away, and Chad is finally ready to let me in.
“I love you too,” I say. Maybe all of this has happened this way for a reason. Otherwise, I might've ended up in upstate New York raising two twin babies with my grandparents instead of being with the man I love. “Oh my god, my grandparents. They were expecting me. They must be so worried.”
“They’re okay. I found their number in your phone and called them. They’re over the moon about the twins and asked you to call them when you’re feeling better.”
Before I can say anything else, the nurse comes in finally to give an update.
For a moment, she stands at the door and smiles at us, then carries a box of tissues closer so that I can wipe my eyes.