Now, though, I had a literal fortune at my disposal. It was just as jarring as the news of them being dead.
Sergei cleared his throat. “Misha. I’m so sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too,” I said. “But thank you for reaching out — and for being a good friend to them.”
“I’ll see you in Moscow,” he replied. “Safe travels.”
I let the phone drop to my lap, not even caring whether the call was truly over or not. Life as I knew it was over, and that was all that mattered right now.
“What was that?” Sadie asked quietly after it became apparent that I wasn’t going to dole out any information freely.
“I have to go,” I said. The words tasted like sand. Before the phone call, I had been savoring what felt like the happiest moment of my life. How could just a handful of minutes derail everything?
“Go where? What happened?” Sadie’s hazel eyes flickered in the light of the candles, and I ached. All I wanted to do was sink back into her and lose myself, but there was no going back now. If only I hadn’t answered that goddamn call.
“My parents are dead.”
She recoiled, and I caught her by the elbow before she could pull completely away from me. “Wait.”
“Misha, oh my God.” Her other hand flew up to cover her mouth, her eyes going glassy with sudden tears. How was it so easy for her to feel like this when I felt nothing? “What? Are you serious right now?” With a jerk of recognition, I realized she was thinking about her own parents. The father she had already lost, even if she had been young. The mother that meant the world to her — who she was always afraid of losing. How could I be so callous?
“I’m sorry,” I said. “Are you okay?”
“Am I okay?” she repeated, dumbfounded. “Are you okay? You … your parents died. How are you okay?”
I blinked rapidly, trying to understand where she was coming from. “I’m doing the best I can do here, Sadie. I’m not sure what you’re asking.”
“Why do you have to go?” she asked, visibly shaking herself in what I assumed was an effort to retake control of her emotions. “The funeral, right?”
Sergei hadn’t even mentioned the funeral. “Yes. And other matters. I’m their sole heir — both in estate and in business. I’m going to have to take some time to untangle some things — particularly on the business side.” I didn’t want to tell her everything Sergei had disclosed to me, especially about his suspicions about their cause of death, mostly because I still needed to process it myself.
“How long do you think you’ll be gone?” Sadie asked.
I shook my head. “I don’t know.”
“So just like that? You’re out of here?” She wrapped her arms around herself and my heart ached.
“I’m sorry, malysh,” I said. I felt like I’d spend the rest of my life apologizing to her for this. It didn’t feel right, leaving. And yet it was something I had to do. My family’s legacy was waiting for me. I had to take it or I would lose it.
“I’m sorry too,” she said, faint. “For your parents. For all of this.” She refused to look me in the eyes, her gaze fixed on some point in the middle of my chest.
I tipped her chin upward with my finger and kissed her. “Wait for me.”
A little line creased the skin between those hazel eyes, and I smoothed it out with the pad of my thumb. “What do you mean?”
“I want you to wait for me,” I repeated. “I don’t know how long I’m going to be gone. But I’m coming back as soon as I can. Are you going to be here when I return?”
Sadie huffed a laugh that was almost a sob. “Where else am I going to go?”
“We’re going to have our time together,” I promised her. “I’m going to come back. Look at me. Am I telling the truth?”
“You’re telling the truth,” she said softly, a single crystalline tear slipping down her cheek. I kissed it away, but I knew there would be nothing I could do about the tears that would follow that one. I wasn’t going to be here. “I’m going to miss you.”
“I’m going to miss my heart,” I said, laying my palm on her chest, between her perfect breasts. “Do you know why? Because you’re going to have it the entire time I’m gone, malysh. Take care of it. Now. Let’s go. I’ll walk you home. Then I have to go. There’s a plane waiting for me already.”
She gave me a brave smile. “You go do what you need to do,” she said. “I’m just going to stay here a little longer and take my time walking back. Wouldn’t want my mom getting suspicious of where we were.”
The secrecy all seemed so pointless now, and mortality made me recognize the folly of my ways. What I felt for Sadie was special. I shouldn’t have wasted time sneaking around. I should’ve shouted from the rooftops how I felt about her. But that was all in the past now. There was no point of wasting time on regrets.