Things didn’t always goto plan and sometimes, an hour of work turned into five hours, three lengthy phone calls and enough paperwork to flatten a fucking field.
Looking at what I had in front of me, I suppose I had neglected more than I originally thought.
When Vittoria knocked on my office door hours ago, I responded with a curt, “What?” but was immediately put in my place when she pushed open the door, standing by it with a small smile, as my two terrors ran in, already bathed and dressed in their pajamas, ready for bed.
I took a moment, hugging and kissing them both, making sure to give them enough of me that they never felt like a burden. And when I stood to walk them to bed, my heart both warmed and cooled at the sight of Vittoria moving forward and the boys taking her hands without hesitancy. “It’s okay. I’ll take them.”
“You don’t even know where their room is.”
Why was I fighting this? It was a good thing, wasn’t it?
Her easy, “They’ll show me,” had my lips thinning. And then it hit me why I was feeling so sore.
After their mom died, I took on the role of both mother and father. I fed them. I did the bathing. I dressed them and put them to bed. And now, I watched my boys hold the hand of a veritable stranger so comfortably. It was as if I wasn’t required anymore. Like I was utterly expendable.
Talk about a solid kick to the nuts.
But as I looked at my young wife, I had to remind myself that she was only trying to help. She had first hand experience on the single father gig. She knew how hard it was. After her mother died, her father had been her sole parent. Like me, I was sure he did the best he could to make sure his little girl never felt like she went without.
And as I glanced at my sons, my chest grew taut.
Her father was all she had, and I had taken that from her.
Immediately humbled, I moved, not stopping until I was directly in front of her. She looked up at me and when I peered down at her, I felt warmth spread around my middle. I leant down to press a chaste kiss to her forehead. “Thanks,” and was immediately rewarded with that honey sweet smile I loved so much and suddenly, those intrusive thoughts fled.
Now, as I hunched over my desk unable to see clearly anymore, a quick glance at my wristwatch told me why. It was past two in the morning. With a long, drawn-out breath, I got up, leaving my jacket and tie behind and decided to sneak into bed with my sleeping wife.
Only, my sleeping wife wasn’t there. And so began my search. It didn’t take long to find her. Vittoria sat upright on one sofa with the laptop I’d bought her resting on her thighs and she was typing a mile a minute. In fact, she hadn’t even noticed my approach. But what surprised me was that she wasn’t alone. Sleeping on the sofa across from her was Ella and it looked as though she’d been asleep for some time.
Vittoria sighed, lifting her arms up above her head, linking her hands and stretching her back out. She moved her head from side-to-side, hissing lightly as she worked out a kink in her neck. And I frowned. “What are you doing?”
She jumped, spooked, and when she turned to face me, I found her glare to be even more adorable than her smile. “Jesus Christ. Don’tdothat. I have the heart of a canary. One bad scare is all it’ll take. You’ll find me cold and lifeless on the cage floor in the morning.”
A reluctant smile pulled at my lips.
I was coming to find that my wife was funny.
I observed my sleeping daughter. “Why isn’t she in bed?”
Vittoria had since gone back to typing. “She said you normally let her stay up to watchLove Island.”
My, “She’s twelve. You let her watch that garbage?” had her stilling.
Her wide eyes somehow looked even larger when gave herself away by nodding as she nervously choked out, “No.” Her gaze went from Ella then back to me and what she said next, she whispered, “But don’t ask her because, you know, she doesn’t like me so she’s going to say I let her watch that…” she swallowed hard. “…garbage, you know, to get me in trouble.” When my eyes were drawn to the pile of chocolate wrappers on the table, Vittoria shrunk in on herself and she muttered timidly, “Also, somebody let Ella eat those.”
I was close to laughing. “Was that somebody you?”
She shook her head but her body slumped as she confessed, “Yeah.”
Fuck me, I almost couldn’t stand it. I needed to get my daughter into bed so I could get my wife into bed. So, I scooped my daughter up and tucked her in, but when I tried to use the same tactic on my wife, she stopped me with one hand to my chest while she continued to type with the other. “Tor, I can’t leave this. Vincenza said it needs to be done by tomorrow.”
Pardon me?
I wasn’t sure I heard her right.
“Do what?” came my abrasive question.
“You know.” She shrugged like it was no big deal. “Balancing the books.”