I took a step closer and loomed over her. “Trust me, little Princess, if there’s one person I care more about myself in this entire world, it’s you. So watch your fucking tone and tell me where you are going because I will not let you put yourself in danger just because you’re mad at me.”
Her eyes were gleamed with tears as she whispered, “I’m going to Emma’s house for a sleepover.” Mia looked away, her shaking hands clutching the duffle bag. “I’ll call a cab.”
“Like hell you will,” I answered and pulled away to calm myself. Because if she cried or even a single tear fell from her eyes, I was going to lose it and lock her with me until we both calmed down enough to have a conversation about my past. “I’ll drop you off. Stay here.”
I trusted her enough not to run away when I went upstairs into her room. Picking the thing I was looking for, I came back and sighed internally to see her waiting for me at the front door. Even mad, she didn’t want to disappoint me.
Her eyes lit up a little when I handed her the elephant stuffy she couldn’t sleep without. She clutched it to her chest, and I looked away, tugging at the collar of my shirt.
“Let’s go.”
* * *
The rideto Emma’s house was filled with silence and, unfortunately for both of us, it was full of tension and anger and guilt. Although, the guilt was all over me. I couldn’t tell her everything. I couldn’t open up about myself just yet. I was a selfish piece of shit who wanted to cling to her for a little more.
She can hate me all she wants after she knows.
“Call me if anything happens,” I said, gripping the steering wheel so tight that my knuckles turned pale just so I wouldn’t lift my hand and wrap it around her wrist and tell her to wait.
Mia didn’t even look at me as she opened the door and stepped out, saying a small “Goodnight.”
My jaw clenched as I watched her lithe frame walk past the golden tall gates, even the security guard smiling at her. From the car, I watched someone open the double doors and Mia disappeared into the mansion of Dorothy Moore.
Despite being a school night, I reversed my car and drove to one club where I knew I would find peace among the chaos. I needed a couple of drinks.
21
SHOW ME YOU CARE
MIA
“Ithink I might be asexual.”
Emma pausedHowl’s Moving Castle,and we both turned to Summer who was sprawled on an entire couch by herself, stuffing kernels of popcorn in her mouth. Emma’s house was built like a mansion and had its own home theater, where we all were currently sprawled with tons of blankets, pillows, snacks and junk food to last a month.
“Didn’t you hook up with an entire football team?” I asked.
“I didn’t. It’s a rumor.”
Emma patted the sheet masks that were on our face and motioned me to remove it. “Then why do you think you might be asexual?”
She shrugged and sat up, staring at her lap and thinking hard. “I don’t feel any sexual desire whatsoever towards anyone. Unless it’s Howl, of course.”
“Of course.” Emma and I muttered in unison. Howl and other Ghibli heroes were perfect boyfriend materials.
“Maybe you could be demisexual? Isn’t asexuality a spectrum?” I said, patting the serum of the mask all over my face and down my neck. As soon as I had arrived, Emma had ordered me to put on one of her skincare items.
“Could be, and it is.” Summer glanced at both of us and smiled. “Thanks guys. I just feel weird that I used to go on so many dates, and I just feel so awkward if anyone hugs me for a second longer.”
“Aw, I get that. You don’t have to date if you don’t want to. Only a few boys in the football team will feel heartbroken.”
I nudged my shoulder with her. “How’s your favorite quarterback doing?” Caleb was one of the best players in our school football team.
Emma twirled her hair and scowled. “We had a fight, and he’s been avoiding me ever since.” She sniffed and got comfortable on the couch, patting the side for me to squeeze in. I snuggled with the blanket as she continued, “I know he was wrong, so I’m waiting for him to apologize.”
I remembered the small fight I had with James about trust and not having earned it. “How do you know it’s not your fault, Em?” I asked and quickly added, “I mean, I’m not taking sides, but what if you both were right and… don’t know how to solve it?”
Summer quipped in, “Communication is very important to have a healthy relationship.”