As he’s probably happy about, since it means he won’t have to deal with it either. Although if he’s going to be mad at anyone about however much staving off the toxin’s effects have expanded the tentacles he’s so intent on concealing, he really needs to take that up with Jacob, not me.
Part of me wants to sink right into the earth and never return, but I’m aware that’s not a viable strategy.
I force myself to open my eyes. Focusing on the shadowy landscape beyond my feet rather than any of the men around me, I flex my muscles and ease into a sitting position.
Halfway up, I sway. Dominic’s hand shoots out to steady me, with a tremor that runs through it as he catches my weight.
How much did the healing process take out of him?
I lean my hands into the grass so I can hold my own balance, tensing and relaxing each section of my limbs to get a sense of how much they can endure.
I might be able to walk right now. I think running is probably out of the question. Definitely no scaling cliffsides or squeezing through ventilation shafts.
Thankfully I should never have to do either of those things again, since they weren’t my idea in the first place.
There’s a moment of silence, as if the men are waiting to see if I’m going to say something. Andreas clears his throat.
“Riva, I’m sorry,” he says, his voice hoarse despite his efforts. “So sorry. I only wanted to make sure we could trust you—and I’d seen that we could. Tonight wasn’t about trying to trick you. I really did want to just talk with you. The rest… The rest I wasn’t expecting at all.”
A noise comes out of me that’s something like a snort. At the same time, ridiculous tears burn at the edges of my eyes.
I am not going to fucking cry over this manipulative lying asshat.
Andreas goes on, still strained but not showing any offense at my response. “I went upstairs to tell the guys that they’d been wrong—we’dbeen wrong—and that you’d been telling the truth about everything. I would have told you the whole truth once I knew they’d come around.”
Easy for him to claim that now.
My hand lifts instinctively to my neck, but there’s nothing for my fingers to close around. With a jab of anguish, I remember that I broke the necklace. Dropped it.
It’s probably lying on the floor back there in the farmhouse. Not that it matters when it’s cracked apart—
Another form crouches right in front of me, hand outstretched. I’m about to recoil from Jacob when my gaze catches on the glint of sliver resting on his fingers.
“This is yours, Wildcat,” he says, his eyes piercing into mine. “I twisted the broken bit back together. It should hold until we can get it properly soldered.”
I don’t want to take anything from him—but it doesn’t really count when the thing was already mine anyway, does it?
My hand darts out to snatch the pendant from his hand. I tug the chain around my neck to attach it in its proper place, feeling abruptly like I’m a wild animal they’re all trying to coax into tameness.
I’mnot the one who’s been going around savaging and shunning people for no reason at all.
“Okay,” I say stiffly, my voice still a little weak. “I’m healed enough that I can get by. You can all go back to your quest now.”
Zian steps into view and stalls at the edge of my vision. “What are you saying?”
Do I really have to spell it out?
“You don’t need me. You don’t want my help. I’m finally getting the message loud and clear. You can stop jerking me around, and I’ll go find something else to do with the rest of my life and you can go on with yours.”
“Riva.”
Andreas touches my shoulder, but I jerk away from him. I glare at him before casting my gaze around me at all four of the guys.
The tears well up again anyway. I cracked something open down in the basement with Andreas, and apparently all Dominic’s work didn’t stitch that part of me shut again.
My emotions bubble up to the surface faster than I can catch them. “I thought we were blood, and we’d be there for each other like we always used to be. That you’d see how much you all still meant to me and know I hadn’t changed. But that was obviously stupid of me, so I’m accepting reality.”
I move to get up, but Jacob catches me first. He looms over me, his knees coming to rest against mine, his hands framing my face and holding it so I have to look at him.