“Yep. Well, he’s somehow gained their trust stupidly fast. We need to keep an eye out because I have a bad feeling they’re going to cause us trouble. I haven’t heard anything yet, but I just know something’s coming,” he said tiredly.
My eyes were adjusting to the dark more, and I could see his hand raking through his hair with frustration. For someone who claimed they didn’t like anyone, he was doing a bad job at proving it.
Guilt was eating at him over Reid, and he’d already confessed he gave a shit about me. I didn’t know how to feel about that, but I was starting to appreciate having him on my side.
“I’ll keep an ear out. I’ll make sure Mom and my dads let me know of anything too, if you want?”
“Is that a smart idea?” he asked dryly, glancing at me. “I know I’ve been a dick about you attending races, but if you want out, Donovan, just tell me. It’s not fair to keep you in the middle of this mess.”
“I’m pissed at you for not reining in Slick’s behavior before now, but Reid’s accident wasn’t your fault,” I admitted, staring out into the dark to avoid his gaze that was burning into me. “Reid’s an adult. He chose to race and he knew the dangers. It wasn’t fair for me to pin the blame on you. It’s Slick’s fault and that’s it.”
“I’ve been thinking of shutting this shit down, you know?” he murmured, the gravel crunching under his feet as he shifted. “It’s pathetic, but the races are the only social thing I have that doesn’t consist of asshole dealers or clients. I get to race and enjoy cars like a normal person my age.”
“You know,” I started, a chuckle leaving me as I glanced at him. “If you want to hang out, we can always get the others together at the bar or something. We don’t have to risk our lives to illegally race cars in order to hang out.”
He snorted, not convinced. “You might be willing to do that, but the others won't. Blake only talks to me when she has to, and Reid might not even be alive by the end of the week because of this shit. Logan won’t want to hang out now either.”
“Are you lonely?” I teased, nudging his shoulder with mine. “People don’t hang out with you outside of these races because you’ve made it that way. You don’t like friends, remember?”
“Maybe it’s time for a change,” he said on an exhale, wariness in his voice.
“Are you going through some kind of midlife crisis?” I joked but patted his shoulder to show him I wasn’t serious. If he wanted out, I couldn’t blame him.
He let out a light laugh, the tension easing from him. “I’m only twenty-two.”
“Our lifestyle means a shorter life expectancy. We’ll all be lucky to reach fifty,” I muttered, discomfort washing through me at the thought of leaving Luna behind. She needed me, and if something happened to her?
I couldn’t think about it.
“You meanmylifestyle,” he said bluntly “You try and keep yourself separated from all this bad shit.”
“And how’s that working for me?” I grumbled, absently tapping the toe of my shoe against my bat. “My family’s a bunch of criminals, my friends are all criminals, and I’m an adrenaline junkie. I get a kick out of doing dumb shit and risking my life.”
“You need a different kind of adrenaline rush,” he suggested, sounding thoughtful. “Get your girlfriend to choke you in bed or something. Much safer.”
“Hey, I’m in charge in the bedroom,” I argued as he let out a bark of laughter.
“Don’t be afraid to change things up. If you really don’t like that idea though, you could always go to those places that let you jump out of planes. Or just join up with one of the crews. They get shot at all the time.”
“Would you like to have dinner tonight?” I asked randomly as the idea popped into my head, a huff of annoyance leaving me as he gave me a gentle shove.
“I mean, I guess. I won’t tell your girlfriend you asked me out. Shit, do I have to put out for you? Just a heads up, I haven’t shaved my nuts this month.”
“You’re a dick. I’m going to see if Blake wants to come too. Luna might come if she hasn’t eaten already,” I said as I thought out loud, giving him the side eye. “But if you want to eat all by yourself…”
“No, I’d like to go,” he said quickly, making me smirk.
“That’s what I thought. Get to know Blake better. She’d be a good friend for you to have.”
“It wouldn’t work.” He sighed while jiggling his keys, a sign he was ready to go.
“Why not?”
“Because I’d spend too much time trying to fuck her,” he said without hesitation, zero humor in his tone. “She’s fucking hot. You know that.”
“Hey, I heard girls think you’re hot. Maybe if you showed interest in her outside of the races, she’d be up for a roll in the sheets. I bet she’s a screamer,” I stated, a groan leaving him.
“Let’s get going. You call both of them. If I ask Blake to come out for dinner, she’ll hang up on me.”