Chapter Nineteen
As requested, Quinn presented himself at Lucien Strathmore’s elegant townhouse the first thing the next morning. He hadn’t gone to sleep at all after his altercation with Adrian the night before. He’d simply returned to the station and poured over paperwork until dawn, then gone home, bathed, and dressed in the finest suit he owned, which admittedly was not nearly fine enough for an audience with an earl.
Especially not when one had been caught in a very compromising position with said earl’s sister.
A haughty butler showed Quinn into a parlor decorated in cool shades of blue, then left him cooling his heels while he went to inform the earl he’d arrived.
Quinn began to pace, his head and heart at war with one another, as they’d been all night.
On the one hand, he knew that the rules of the society in which they lived demanded that he marry Allison. He’d ruined her by every known definition of the word. When he thought of all the intimate ways he’d touched her, it seemed to be the only solution. And truthfully, his heart sang at the thought of truly having her as his own, even if he’d earned that right in the most underhanded of ways.
But he also knew that the last thing Allison wanted was to marry, especially someone like him. He didn’t belong in her world, nor she in his. The circumstances of their forced union would surely tear apart anything that had been sweet and beautiful about it.
About ten minutes passed, with Quinn no closer to knowing what he should do, when Hawkesmere finally deigned to join him.
“O’Brien,” Hawkesmere said, sounding every inch the earl as he shut the door behind him.
“Hawkesmere,” Quinn replied, trying to sound just as remote.
“Allison told Adrian what happened last night before he took her home, and he has relayed her story to me,” Lucien said without preamble.
Quinn said nothing. He had no idea what Allison had said, no clue which of his many sins he actually stood accused of. But one thing his many years of questioning others had taught him was never to give away any more than he had to.
Lucien shook his head and walked over to the sideboard, pouring them both steaming cups of coffee from a silver coffee pot that probably cost more than Quinn had made last year.
“Well, what do you have to say for yourself?” Lucien asked impatiently once he handed one of them to Quinn.
Swallowing thickly, Quinn forced himself to meet Lucien’s eyes. They’d been acquaintances of a sort for years, but he’d certainly never expected to be having such a conversation with the man. “I will do whatever Allison wants. If she chooses to marry me to quiet the scandal, I am more than happy to do so. However, she has told me many times that the last thing she wants is to be any man’s wife.”
Lucien took a sip of his coffee and then sat down in a wing-backed chair, indicating for Quinn to take the one across from him. “Did she truly come to you in the middle of the night and ask you to be her lover?”
Quinn choked on his coffee, stunned that Allison had been that forthcoming with her brother. What else had she told him? “I’m afraid so,” he managed.
“Bloody hell.” Lucien put his coffee aside, shaking his head. “That must have put you in a very awkward situation, and I’m glad you handled it the way you did. I’ve always respected you, O’Brien, and your behavior last night makes me glad that you’re the one she chose.”
Apparently, Allison hadn’t told her brother everything that had happened. Quinn cleared his throat, overwhelmed with guilt. “Nevertheless, I did not foresee that we might encounter such a crush in Mayfair last night, and I should have. I suppose the... surprise of it all clouded my mind. The last thing I ever wanted was to put her in a compromising situation. I deeply regret that we’re having this conversation at all.”
“I suppose one could say that she put you in a compromising situation first. But that’s neither here nor there. It happened, and now it’s up to the two of us to figure a way out of it.” Lucien sighed and tapped on the rim of his coffee cup.
Suddenly, the ridiculousness of the situation hit Quinn
, and he finally truly understood what Allison had been fighting against. “With all due respect, shouldn’t it be up to Allison and me, not you and me? After all, this is the rest of our lives we’re talking about.”
Lucien let out an explosive sigh. “If left to her own devices, she’d never make the right choice.”
Quinn pinned Allison’s brother with a searching stare. “Is that really what you think? She’s a grown woman with a mind of her own and the financial means to take care of herself. Do you think forcing her into a marriage with a man she doesn’t love is going to be right for anyone but the busybodies of the ton, who will never accept me as proper husband anyway?”
Lucien gave a surprised huff of laughter. “That sounds like something my wife would say.” He shook his head. “You must know that I don’t give a fig what the ton says. My brothers and I have already defied their narrow-minded opinions on who we should wed, and it really hasn’t affected us in the slightest. And you’re right. If I force Allison to marry you, she’ll only make us both miserable.”
Quinn sat back in his chair, relaxing for the first time since he’d entered the room. “That’s very true. However, if she wanted to marry me....” He trailed off, not certain what more he wanted to say or even why he’d brought it up. He’d come into this meeting dreading being forced into marrying Allison, but now he realized he was actually disappointed that it was looking as though maybe that wouldn’t happen after all.
Lucien leaned forward, his gaze intent. “Do you love her?”
Quinn’s tension returned full force. He’d never actually allowed himself to answer that question. “I care for her. More than I should. I suppose that’s all I’m ready to admit to at the moment.”
“I know you think I’m being heavy-handed with her, and maybe I am. But my brothers and I have all found someone to love. And after a childhood of having very little in the way of care and nurturing, I can’t tell you how wonderful it is to have someone who cares about me. In Allison’s case, she was even more alone because at least the twins and I had each other.” Lucien paused and took a sip of his coffee, seeming to be struggling to find the words to continue.
Quinn took a drink of his own coffee, his heart breaking a bit at the thought of little Allison and her cold, heartless mother.