“Percy.” I turned when the Princess called my name. Lord Halvorsen was gone, thankfully, and I walked back to her.
“I don’t like you wandering off,” she told me as she reached out to take hold of my arm.
“Sorry, Ma’am,” I apologised. It’s not like it mattered if I wandered off; he had her attention. He was what she wanted. I had forgotten he existed. Like a bad dream, you quickly forget on waking, but this nightmare seemed to be repeating.
“Rebecca called for a car. What would you like to eat when we get home?” she asked, walking toward the office and pulling me along by the arm.
“I’m not hungry,” I told her.
She stopped and pulled me in front of her. I couldn’t look at her. I didn’t know if I was angry or sad, but I was devastated.
“Pet, you need to eat,” she told me, her hand lifting my chin to look at her.
“I don’t want to. I can’t.” I could barely swallow, barely talk; my throat was all tight, and it felt like a lump was stuck in it.
She did not respond in words but pulled me back to her side, her arm around my shoulder and her nose pressed to my head.
When we arrived home, the Princess went straight to the bathroom to shower and instructed me to do so too when she exited.
After I was clean, I dressed in sweatpants and a simple tank top. The Princess sat on the couch waiting for me and wordlessly opened her arms for me.
I approached her slowly, and she pulled me into her lap as soon as I was within reach.
“Percy, I know you’re upset,” she told me as she adjusted me in her lap to a more comfortable position. Despite my mood, I snuggled closer to her. It was automatic, instinctive; even though she was the source of my pain, her arms were also my refuge.
“No, you don’t. You can’t know how this feels,” I told her. She didn’t know what it was like to be so helplessly in love with someone and for that someone to be absolutely perfect and wonderful, and although you would do anything to be what they wanted, it simply would never be enough. I wasn’t a noble. I had no title. And she would not choose me.
“Do you want to tell me how you feel?” she asked as she pressed her lips against my neck. The simple act of affection was relaxing and even as my throat was tight and I held back tears, I leaned further into her.
“I love you,” I told her. “But you don’t love me and don’t want me. You want him,” I whispered. That’s what it came down to. I was sure she cared for me. But she didn’t love me. She didn’t want me the same way back.
“All I desire from Oskar Halvorsen is a politically beneficial union,” she explained. But it didn’t change anything. She would marry him eventually and then what? And that thought hurt me more. She would marry him.
“It doesn’t matter. You’re going to marry him. You can’t exactly keep me around, in your bed, when you have a husband,” I told her sadly, wiping at my eyes as a few tears escaped. She should marry me.
“Yes, I can,” she replied sharply. “You. Are. Mine. Percy.” She stated and punctuated each word with a kiss against my neck, below my ear, my jaw and at the corner of my lips. “Halvorsen can sleep in the guest room.” She laughed. “I’d never kick you out of bed.” And she raised her hand to wipe my tears from my cheeks. “You will stay with me regardless of changing circumstances. I’ve made this clear to you. You are mine, and I intend on keeping you around until death forcefully separates us.”
Her words of reassurance and her affectionate touch were comforting. I knew that I could not change her decision concerning Lord Halvorsen. It was out of my control. But if I could have her only partly, I would accept what she offered. There was no alternative.
5. Old Friends
Persephone Flores
I liked wearing the Borealis colours; I decided when I put my uniform on. It was a physical representation that I served Borealis and belonged to the Princess.
I straightened my tie and went to the small kitchen table, where a mug of coffee waited for me. The Princess was dressed for classes also and drank from a bloodbag while looking over her class schedule.
“Is your coffee still hot?” she asked me as I took a sip.
“Yes, it’s perfect. Thank you,” I replied and watched as her lips closed around the bloodbag again.
“Do I have a class schedule yet?” I enquired curiously. She finished the bloodbag and stood to throw it away.
“You do,” she said, walking to stand behind my chair. She leaned forward, wrapped her arms around my neck from behind, and pressed her nose against my head, breathing deeply. “I love your scent,” she told me before releasing me to retake her seat.
“I’ve signed you up for classes I believe will match your skills. You still have servant classes. This term covers political structure within the Kingdom, basic but essential knowledge. Most are already very familiar with our means of power and control; however, I fear you have been rather sheltered, pet, so do pay attention in your lessons. I have also arranged for you to attend an introductory healing class,” she told me, handing me a schedule that contained my classes highlighted in blue and the Princess’s highlighted in red.
“I’m not sheltered,” I complained, embarrassed. Did she think me simple? “And why healing?”