I shake the thoughts and pull my suitcase off the carousel, waiting for my mom to pick me up at the airport. I caught the redeye, so the only thing I could see outside were headlights. My phone vibrates in my hand, and I feel a lump form in my throat when I see Eric's name. The little circle filled with a picture of us sticking our tongues out.
I don't even realize it, but I'm squeezing the phone so hard my fingers are red. I want to open the message and read it, but I'm afraid I'll give in and respond. I stare at the unopened message.
I can open it, right? I can read it and then just not respond.
Eric: What do you call a pig that does karate?
Don't respond. Don't respond. Don't respond.
Me: What?
Eric: A PORK CHOP!
I laugh out loud, causing an older man a few chairs down to glare at me.
Me: I needed that laugh.
Eric: I need you.
The words make my ears ring, and my vision goes a little blurry.
Me: We can't.
Eric: Can't or won't?
Me: Both.
Eric: Take Hanna out of the equation. How would you feel then?
I contemplate leaving it on delivered, but I send some truth instead. Even though I'll probably regret it later.
Me: I would love you.
I do love you.
I watch my mom appear through the doors, and I practically melt into her hug. It isn't until I'm in the car that I completely fall apart.
"Honey, what's wrong?"
I calm my tears and rest my shaking hands on my thighs. "Everything is wrong."
"Hanna found out about Eric," She acknowledges, and I nod.
Guilt ripples through my veins, making me feel hot.
"You guys are best friends. You'll work it out."
There's hardly anyone as optimistic as my mother, so I offer her a side stare. One that saysget real.
"They were broken up," mom argues, "She's living with another man."
"That doesn't mean it wasn't messed up! I broke girl code."
Mom reaches over and squeezes my hand, "When it comes to love, girl code turns to bullshit."
"I wish. Until Hanna found out, everything was so easy. So effortless."
She doesn't hesitate, "love shouldn't feel hard. If it's easy, it's right."