“I know you are,” She shakes her head, “I just don’t know how I feel about it.”
I sigh, stepping toward the door, grabbing the handle, “You know I’d never choose him over you.”
She nods, a small smile cracking her serious stare, “Hoes before bros?”
I hold out my fist for her to bump, “Sisters before misters.”
Pulling the door open, I walk out to my car. Spending time with Hanna, even for just a minute, feels familiar and safe. Something that takes me back to our college days when all we had was each other.
I stare over at my passenger seat and feel a wave of sadness. I just have one more pitstop before heading to Charleston.
CHAPTER 26
ERIC
For three straight days, I’ve thought nonstop about what Karly said. Not knowing how to fall in love is bullshit. I know that, and so does she. Love should be the easiest thing you ever do, but all we’ve done for months is fight our feelings.
I feel like if we could figure out the details, everything else would just fall into place. I’d have her, and I wouldn’t need anything else. Yesterday I came home from yet another shift at the hospital to limp duck on my porch.
Talk about a freaking jab to the heart. Who knew that little mangy thing could pull at my heartstrings like that? I knew, in the back of my mind, that she wanted to cut whatever ties we had the second that she walked away from me at the police station the other day. I just didn’t realize how much it would hurt to see something like limp duck sitting there staring at me, you know, with his one eye and all.
But it hit me right in the chest. It hurt. I was hurt. I wasn’t mad at her, though, because this was on me. She said from the beginning that this would end badly. I should’ve listened to her. I should’ve left her alone.
Thanksgiving with the Blackwoods has always been a circus of its own. Still, my mom insists we all get together and eat. Every year is the same. My mom and Emma cook pretty much all day while the guys watch football and argue over pretty much anything we can think of. My brother Ethan and his wife Andrea aren’t coming this year. Conveniently, something to do with the church dinner stands in the way. Lainey will be here, though, and she’ll be glad they aren’t here. They won’t admit it, but I think my parents will be relieved too. I know I am.
“Where’s Alaina?” Mom asks, searching the room.
I laugh, “You mean, Lainey?”
She rolls her eyes. “No. I mean uh-lay-nuh,” she pronounces.
“She refuses to give into the nickname,” Emma huffs, scooping some yellow goop into the tops of the deviled eggs.
“That’s my only grandbaby. I’m going to call her by her name,” Mom snaps.
I couldn’t help but remember just last year, Ellie was here helping mom in the kitchen, her blonde hair tied back and a tiny apron on her body.
“I’m sorry, Eric. I didn’t mean it like that. We all really miss Ellie.”
I shake my head, trying to shield my feelings, “It’s okay. I’m gonna head outside and throw some wood on the fire.”
It’s easier to leave than to sit and talk about how I’m feeling with the women in my life. I toss another piece of wood into the flames, watching as they engulf the pile.
“Glad to see my brother is still in one piece,” Emma says, but it sounds more like a question.
I decide quickly to ignore her because, yeah, I don’t feel like talking. She sits in one of the chairs, watching the fire, pulling her hands up to warm them.
“Ty says I’m nosy,” She blurts, “he says I shouldn’t pry, but I can’t help it. I wanna know what’s going on with my brother.”
I shake my head, “Ty’s right. You are nosy.”
“Shut up,” she says, pushing my arm playfully. “I just care about you. Is that so fucking awful?”
I put a fake pained expression on my face, “It’s fucking terrible.”
She stands up, brushing the back of her jeans off, “Okay. I’ll go.”
Instantly I feel guilty for being an ass, “Stop. I didn’t mean it. I’m glad you care. You remind me of mom.”