The easygoing way he started a conversation with her was a nice distraction. She hadn’t really thought about it, but now that he mentioned it, she knew she had to get on that. She loved her parents but certainly wasn’t going to live with them, not at twenty-two years old.
“I haven’t really thought about it, but I suppose I should do that pretty soon.”
“If you want, I can take you around to some of the places I know that are on the market?”
She looked over at him, a bit surprised by his offer. “Really?”
He looked over at her and knit his brows, as if what she had just said was the most ludicrous thing in the world. “Of course. I’d do anything for you, Sasha.”
His words were spoken so reverently, were so heartfelt, that she felt a wealth of emotion.
“Hey, you okay?” Jonas pulled the truck off to the side of the road and put it in park. He turned his body toward her, and it was the look of concern that had the tears spilling free.
They just came and came, and Sasha felt incredibly stupid, but she couldn’t stop them. The next thing she knew was that she was in Jonas’s arms, and he was murmuring against her hair.
Her sobbing made it impossible to hear exactly what he said, but she could tell the words were meant to soothe her. Sasha had no idea what had gotten into her. Maybe it was the fact she was finally realizing that she had wasted so many years with unjust fears and worries and letting her emotions and hurt from when she was eighteen cloud her judgment and keep her away.
She was older now, an adult, and everything negative that happened until this particular moment seemed so frivolous. There had been countless times she thought about that night with Tanner. She knew how he was, yet she had let her teenage dreams and wants shape the reality of the situation.
Sasha needed to make things different, and that was going to start right now.
Jonas held her and let her cry, and after what felt like forever, her tears finally dried, and she forced herself away from him. Humiliation over the fact she had broken down in front of him was strong inside of her, and she couldn’t bring herself to face him.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, hiccupped, and felt even more humiliated.
But his finger under her chin forced her head up and took that option away from her.
“Did someone hurt you?” The way his voice hardened and a dark look that crossed his expression had her shaking her head vehemently.
“No, no. It’s nothing like that.” She wiped at her tears.
“Then what is it, Sasha?” He used his thumbs to brush the wetness away from her cheeks and kept his eyes on hers.
Like she could really tell him that she was in love with him and Tanner, and that she had given her virginity to his brother years ago and was afraid of them in an emotional sense. She also couldn’t admit the reason why she had stayed away and avoided them for so long.
He hadn’t asked, but she could see the question burning behind his eyes. Sasha looked into eyes that were so warm and familiar they brought a fresh wave of tears to her eyes again.
“I’m in love with you, Jonas.” She slapped a hand over mouth, and her eyes widened. Oh God. Had she really just said that?
He stared at her unblinking.
Letting her hand fall, she knew it was too damn late to take it back or make up some lame excuse for why she’d said it. She turned back in her seat and stared out the windshield. She had just totally done that.
Please just go. Please just go.
As if she spoke the mantra out loud, Jonas shifted the truck into drive and pulled back onto the road. The silence was deafening, uncomfortable, and she wanted the earth to open up and swallow her whole.
The fact he didn’t say anything should have made her feel better, but all it did was make the situation worse.
He pulled into her parents’ driveway ten minutes later, and those had been the longest ten minutes of her damn life. Escape sounded like a pretty good idea. Just as she reached for the handle and muttered a thank you, he stopped her with his hand on her arm.
Sasha couldn’t bear to look at him, not after she had inserted her foot into her mouth. She blamed her emotions for the fact she blurted out her lifelong secret.
His voice was soft when he said, “Look at me, please.”
Sasha looked over her shoulder and was struck breathless by how vulnerable he looked. To see a man as strong and fierce as Jonas look as scared as she felt scared her even more. A suspended moment passed where neither of them said anything, but then his next words had her feeling faint.
“Say it again, Sasha.”