The taqueria had started emptying out, and soon it was just the two of us in a quiet corner booth.
“Amelia, I want to apologize.”
“No, I know you didn’t do anything wrong–”
“But I did,” I interrupted her, nodding my insistence. “I should have said something about Colleen’s advances a long time ago. To you, and to your father. She had been acting more and more flirtatious, and it was getting out of hand. She even asked me to come up to Newport with her.”
Amelia scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Typical. Wait until I tell my sisters. They won’t be surprised.”
“I’m so sorry that you saw what you saw. You’ve got to believe me, Amelia; I didnotkiss her, and I gave her no encouragement. But I panicked instead of taking control of the situation. I hope you understand that I would never betray you like that. Ever.”
She sighed. “I know, Nathaniel,” she said, placing a hand on my forearm. “I believe you. Melinda and Larissa do, too. We all know that my mother has been out of control for years.”
“David came by the house, you know,” I said. “He told me they’re getting a divorce. I was sorry to hear about it. No matter what the circumstance, that’s always hard. Are you and your sisters handling it OK?”
“As best as we can,” she said, shrugging. “We’re dealing with it. We all agree it’s been a long time coming. I think it will be better for my dad, anyway. He’s put up with so much. And, frankly, so have us girls. My mother is a selfish person who has always been envious of all three of us. You wouldn’t believe how unkind she has been.”
“I don’t understand why a mother would treat her children that way.”
“She’s always been like this, but she’s gotten worse lately. She’s found everyone’s weak spots and twisted the knife.”
I hated hearing how cruel their mother had been. “I’m sorry that you and your sisters have been through that with her,” I said, shaking my head, unable to understand how Colleen could be so awful. “A mother’s love should be unconditional. You and your sisters deserve that. And I know our baby will have that. You’ll be a wonderful mother, Amelia.”
“That’s the only thing that matters to me,” she said quietly, peering up at me through dark, fluttery eyelashes. “Our baby will be loved. By both parents, no matter what.” I placed my hand over hers, rubbing my thumb gently across the backs of her fingers. She scooted in closer and brought a palm to my cheek, brushing her fingers in a soft caress along my jawline. “I’ve missed you, Nathaniel” she whispered.
“Me too,” I echoed, nodding. I took her hand and brought it to my lips, placing a chaste kiss upon her knuckles. “You have no idea how much.”
“I apologize for not letting you explain that night at my parents’ house. I couldn’t think straight. I was just so shocked and hurt by what I saw, so I panicked,” she said. “I wish I hadn’t overreacted, and I’m sorry.”
“You did no such thing,” I protested. “It was a perfectly normal response to what you witnessed. I’m just grateful you know how much I care for you.” I held both her hands in mine, and leaned in close, trying not to let my voice break from the emotion building in my chest. “I love you, Amelia. I always will.”
“I love you too,” she answered, her eyes glassy with tears.
She leaned up to kiss me, and my world was whole again. Hearing those words, feeling her soft lips and tender caresses, everything was set back to right. Things between us were finally locking into place, and no obstacle would stand in our way now.
When she pulled away, she was smiling. She looked angelic–dark brown eyes, a dusting of freckles across glowing skin, and her soft chestnut hair pulled back with loose strands hanging out. I tucked a few tresses behind her ears, and she blushed.
“Does this mean the wedding is back on?” I asked, eager to know if she still wanted to go through with it. Whatever she answered, whatever the future held, I would be ready to face it as long as Amelia was there by my side.
She bit her lip. “Actually, about that… I’d like to put it on hold. Just for the time being.”
Her answer surprised me somewhat, but with it came a sense of relief. When Amelia had first brought up getting married, it felt like we were rushing into things, but her insistence had won out in the end. Now, she was backtracking, yet I had a feeling her choice was coming from a place of wisdom rather than of impulsivity. “What changed? You were so adamant. I’m not upset, I just want to understand what exactly made you reconsider.”
“Everything happened so fast,” she said, reflecting. “I’ve felt so out of control during the past few months. I thought getting married would give me back that control, and that it would prove to my father that I was doing the right thing. Theadultthing. But I pushed too hard, too quickly.” She reached for my hand and squeezed it. “I still want to marry you, except I think it should be when we’re both ready for it, when we’ve decided it’s the right time. I don’t want to keep planning a wedding just because I feel like it would appease others and seem better from the outside looking in.” She pursed her lips, and twitched her jaw, waiting for my reaction. “Is that alright?”
I was glad she was in tune with her real wants and desires, and able to express them to me. With every obstacle we had faced, our communication was getting better and better, and I knew we had a strong foundation no matter what came next.
“Of course it’s alright,” I said, kissing her softly on the cheek. She smiled, letting out a gentle sigh of relief. “You’re right,” I continued. “It's too fast. Just know that I’ll wait for you, Amelia. As long as you want.”
“You won’t have to wait too long,” she said, smiling sweetly. “I promise.”
We cuddled for a while in the taqueria, talking about our excitement for the baby’s arrival and dreaming about our future together, and it dawned on me that this was the first Christmas Eve I had enjoyed in a very long time.
Chapter 47
Amelia
Christmas Day was windy and cool, with a bright blue sky. I had awakened in Nathaniel’s arms after spending the night back at home with him, and we drank our coffee upstairs in the bedroom overlooking the whitecaps on the surface of the sea. After cuddling and talking some more about how excited we felt to become new parents, he headed downstairs to make me a special Christmas breakfast before it was time for me to leave.