“Once a dragon and a rider mate, the dragon gains free rein over the rider’s magic, taking it for themselves. Dragons can go too far with this, take too much magic and essentially leaving the rider useless and magicless.”
“What is this bullcrap that they’re feeding you? You seriously can’t believe that, can you?” Landers exploded again.
“Enough, Landers,” Philit warned, just as tired with his outbursts as I was.
“I met them,” I said in a low voice, looking away from Landers. “The riders without magic. They were…shells. Barely an existence, just going through the motions of life without actually living.”
“Is that what that was about?” Zilon asked, sounding hurt. His pain shook through our bond, making me shudder. “You thought we’d do that to you?”
“When you breathe fire, it’s because of my magic. I send it to you for your dragon breath.”
“You believe all this?” Philit asked, his expression smoothed out into something unreadable. I couldn’t even figure out what he was thinking or feeling through our bond. “You think we’d do something like that?”
“Philit,” Zilon said softly, grabbing his shoulder.
“They were brainwashing her. This has to be the only explanation,” Philit muttered.
“What?” I snapped out. “No! It wasn’t like that at all. I stayed away from the Fae.”
“They probably have a million different ways to manipulate your thinking, Rayna,” Philit said. “And some of those ways probably aren’t noticeable.”
“No. All I did was collect information. I’m not brainwashed.” I needed them to believe that. I was still me, still the same Rayna they knew.
“Then how does it explain your reaction when we tried to have sex?” Philit asked. “You were terrified; you truly believed we were going to take your magic. Your mates. The same dragons who have been by your side since day one of this fucked up journey. We have only ever been by your side, but once we were about to fuck you, you flipped out on us.”
“That isn’t what this is about.”
“Then what is it?” Philit bellowed. “I am trying very hard right now not to shift and burn those bastards to crisps. I am barely holding on right now, and it doesn’t help that my own fucking mate doesn’t want my touch. That she’s terrified of it.”
“I’m not terrified of it,” I snapped back. “I’m trying to understand. There is so much more to the war and to what we are than the Fae hating the dragons and vice versa. There is so much more toall of it, and neither side is perfect. I’m just trying to understand. Trying to wrap my head around the riders I saw, the happiness of those who were “saved” and the devastation of those “saved” too late. They were left with nothing. That was not a fucking illusion.”
I held my hands up and let lightning shoot up through the air. I also made it so I could float. They gaped at me, at what I was able to do. Granted, I only floated about a foot off the ground, but I was still doing it, and that should have been enough to make them believe me.
“This is not an illusion. I am more than just the rider who sits on your back and gives you the ability to breathe fire and become more powerful. And this is only a part of what thosebastardshave taught me. I learned more from them in a week than I did the entire time I was at the academy. The academy was teaching me to be subservient to dragons while the Fae taught me that I’m strong enough to stand on my own. How is that an illusion?”
By the time I’d stopped yelling, I was breathing heavily. I gently placed myself back on the ground, letting my hands fall to my side as I took in gasping breaths.
“We’re living in a world of lies right now, and you’re the only ones I can trust completely,” I said softly. “Please don’t think I’d ever fear you. I don’t know what just happened, but I know for a fact that I one hundred million percent trust you all. We have so much we don’t understand, so many questions unanswered. The only truth I have right now is that the three of you are my mates, and I need you with me. I need you at my side.” My voice cracked. “Please. Believe in me.”
No one said anything for the longest moment, and my lungs ached as I held my breath.
Then, Landers spoke. “One hundred million percent trust, huh?” he asked with a smirk. “That’s a lot of trust in a bastard like me.”
That broke the tension, and we all chuckled, easing the anxiety.
“Fuck.” Philit rubbed at his face roughly before blowing out a breath. “Fuck. Nothing has gone right since meeting you. Everything has been turned upside down in my world.”
The pain of his words was sharp and harsh. I gasped.
Philit grabbed me and pulled me into his chest, kissing my cheek and saying even more softly. “But I wouldn’t want it any other way, Rayna. Without you, everything just seems so fucking bleak and empty. I don’t want to go through that again. I don’t want you gone from my side like that ever again. I couldn’t breathe for the last week.”
“Can we just go?” Landers asked. “Let’s make sure the asshole dragons know where the Fae are and get out of here. Leave this shit behind.”
“It won’t be that easy,” I said. “And you’re going to get both the Fae and the dragonless riders they have with them killed.”
Aylia’s desperate face jumped into my head, and I had to shake off the guilt.
“Come on. We aren’t too far from where the captain is set up.”