CHAPTER SIXTEEN
It was almost 4 p.m. on Christmas Day number nine and I was exhausted. So far I’d helped make lunch, got all the videos down from the loft, taken Cerys to the pub and introduced Manny to the love of his life. Again. Now I was back at Dorothy’s open house, hiding in Dorothy’s bathroom, trying to have five minutes’ peace before Dad set off his apocalyptic fireworks. I was officially out of ideas when it came to the wish. If Manny was right and I was supposed to be sorting out my love life then I was going to be stuck here forever, but at least I would be stuck with people I loved. And also Oliver.
The last week had opened my eyes to so much, the struggles that go on behind closed doors, the problems we keep buried, the sheer dedication it took to make perfect Yorkshire puddings every time. Even if I was here for all eternity, I wondered if I would ever truly be able to learn everything about my family and I’d already known them for my whole life. At least I might manage to make a dent in my Netflix queue.
Much like Dorothy herself, the bathroom where I’d taken refuge was a work of art: Barbie’s Dream Bath made life-size. Pink bath, pink sink, pink toilet, pink blinds, pink towels, pink shower curtain, pink soap, pink loo roll, pink-hued conch shell on the top of the water tank. Everything was pink because Dorothy wanted it pink and she simply hadn’t allowed anyone to tell her otherwise. Dorothy was an icon. We could all learn something from Dorothy, I thought, as I rested my head against the flocked wallpaper and closed my eyes, just for a minute.
I got exactly seventeen seconds before someone started banging on the door.
‘There’s someone in here!’ I yelled as the handle rattled, the ancient bolt loosening against the door.
‘Are you nearly done?’ the interloper called back. ‘I’m going to piss myself out here.’
Washing my hands and chuntering under my breath, I gave the bathroom a sad parting glance, and let myself out, Bernard from the end of the cul-de-sac pushing past me with his flies already undone.
‘Thanking you,’ he said, shoving me out of the way and slamming the door shut behind him, an unmistakable sigh of relief echoing through to the landing.
‘Charming,’ I muttered as I checked to make sure my red velvet dress wasn’t tucked in my knickers. It was nice in the bathroom. Peaceful. You could learn so much about someone from their bathroom, what products they had, what state their towels were in, did they have a big bottle of budget bubble bath, sexy oils or a big glass jar of bougie bath bombs?
‘And now I really want a bath,’ I said with a sigh, reluctant to re-join the party. There was no point seekingout relaxation at home, between Oliver’s guffawing and the kids screaming, it was about as calming as a communal changing room. All I wanted was to dip my head under warm water and drift away until it was time to go to bed and start my day all over again. It would be nice to pretend I was somewhere else, to escape reality for an hour or so.
The bathroom door opened and Bernard walked out, zipping up his fly and giving me a nod.
‘I’d leave it a minute,’ he said, nodding back at the bathroom. ‘Merry Christmas.’
‘Noted,’ I replied, wondering what Lesley saw in him. He must have had something pretty special up his sleeve (or down his trousers) to keep a good woman like her around.
And that’s when I remembered.
‘Wednesday morning aqua-aerobics,’ I whispered, running down the stairs and out the front door, leaving my coat and my cares behind.
My mother had vastly undersold Bernard and Lesley’s pool.
After popping home to ‘borrow’ the key that was hidden in the kitchen drawer where Mum kept All The Things (including but not limited to half-used birthday candles and a slimline Lett’s diary from 1989), I let myself inside the giant glass structure behind Bernard and Lesley’s house, a cloud of humidity swallowing me whole as I stepped out of the real world and into paradise. Whatever I was expecting, this was not it. The greenhouse itself was the size of a small aircraft hangar with an enormous heated pool in the middle, a sunken hot tub at one end and a cold plunge at the other. Sun loungersand palm trees had been placed at precise intervals along either side while grapevines trailed up the glass walls and along the peaked roof, blocking out the house, the village and the rest of the world. The only light came from the large round lamps under the water and everything shimmered and moved as though it wasn’t quite real. I was in heaven.
Everyone would be busy at Dorothy’s for at least another couple of hours, especially with the fireworks, which gave me plenty of time to play anywhere but here. I didn’t have a swimsuit and I didn’t care. Father Declan would be so proud; I was living in the moment and swimming in my knickers. With excited, fumbling fingers, I peeled off my dress, tossed it across one of the sun loungers and dove straight into the deep end in my mismatched underwear.
Everything felt better underwater.
The pressure pushed on my ears, muffling every single sound and tempering my thoughts. My eyes stung when I opened them, but only for a moment and I blinked as the whole world turned bright blue. All around me, my long unruly hair fanned out floating, weightless, and every single worry I had ever had was washed away. I swam around the bottom of the pool, skimming my fingers along the textured surface until my lungs began to burn, forcing me back up to the surface to take a big, life-affirming breath. I was alive. I was still here.
And I wasn’t the only one.
‘Hello, stranger.’
‘Dev!’ I exclaimed, losing my footing and plunging right back under the surface. How would I explain this? Was he going to call the police? Why hadn’t I put ona nicer bra that morning? Why had I worn knickers that barely covered half my arse? I resurfaced with hair plastered all over my face, spitting out a mouthful of water.
‘Nice dive,’ I heard him say as I pushed my hair away and wiped my eyes dry.
‘Thanks, I’ve watchedThe Little Mermaid, like, loads of times. What are you doing here?’
‘I feel like I should be asking you that,’ he replied, walking around the pool towards me.
I doggy-paddled to the side, my heart pounding from the shock of being discovered and the joy of being discovered by Dev. It was three days since our Chatsworth House adventure and absurd as it seemed, given all that was going on, I’d missed him.
‘I was leaving for Dorothy’s and I saw you skulking off down the street,’ he said, and I was relieved to see he was smiling.
Clinging to the edge of the pool, I pressed my body against the wall so he couldn’t see my makeshift bikini. ‘So you followed me?’