“I do. And I’m not worried. Tor will be there. I know he won’t let anything bad happen to me.”
“But will you make sure nothing happens to Tor?” Emily asked, not unkindly.
“I’ll protect him as savagely as he protects me. I promise.”
“I hoped you would say that. When are you moving out?”
“I’m not sure. I figured I would watch for an opportunity that wouldn’t make it look suspicious. I mean, I can’t imagine anyone believing I willingly left this place, having lived here themselves. The people are nice. There’s food. Shelter. Protection. I need to make sure I sell it, you know?”
She nodded. “Just don’t stay there too long. The girls are going to miss having a fourth at feight club.”
I snorted. “You could always join in.”
“No way. I’m a peacemaker, not a fighter.”
She said goodbye just before Tor came downstairs. He didn’t say anything to me as he moved to the stove and started making oatmeal.
“Should we talk about what happened upstairs?” I asked hesitantly.
“Do you want to?”
“I don’t know. Maybe, if you feel upset about any of it.”
“I am not upset.” He glanced back at me. “But I am very hungry for you.”
“I could tell.”
“Did it upset you?”
I slowly shook my head. “I think it should have, though.”
“Why?”
“That’s an excellent question. I think part of my brain is still trying to cling to things the way they were.”
“What do you mean?”
“Before I met Adam, I was going to school to get my marketing degree. My dad used to say I was learning how to convince people they needed something they didn’t want.” I gave Tor a wry smile. “In a way, he was right.
“I had a plan for myself—degree, career, then a family. I saw men as a distraction I didn’t need until I was ready. That changed a little when I met Adam. Through a thousand small acts, he won my heart and made me believe he needed me as much as I needed him.”
I looked down at my hands, trying to sort through what I was thinking and feeling.
“I’m not mad at Adam for hurting my heart. I understand why he left. He felt like he couldn’t protect me like you could, and he wanted me to be safe above all else. Even above our happiness together. But knowing his motivations doesn’t change how hurt and sad I still am.”
“Time will help with that.”
I nodded in agreement.
“I know. It already has, and that’s part of the problem. The way I’m feeling just seems like it’s changing too fast. But that’s based on how the old world worked. This new one’s different. Yesterday’s close call has me wondering so much. Am I moving too slowly for this world? Should I let go of the past more quickly? What if all I have is today?”
Tor came over and hugged me.
“You will have many, many days, my June. I will let nothing happen to you. Take all the time you need to know your head and your heart so I may know them, too.”
The guy just kept melting me in all the right ways. I returned his hug and reluctantly released him to sit at the island, letting what he said turn over in my head.
After I’d eaten breakfast, we geared up and left the house. This time, when Tor picked me up at the wall, I let my fingers explore the wall of his chest. I could feel him glancing down at me and wasn’t surprised when he stopped outside of Tenacity, set me on my feet, and hugged me to him.