I thought back, trying to pinpoint exactly what happened.
“I think the spark just faded for both of us. In the beginning, it was new and exciting. I loved when he touched me and said sweet things. But the sweet things and the touches became less frequent. I was supposed to be turned on just because he was ready, and I’m not wired like that. He started to get frustrated. I started to feel bad about myself, which made me resentful. It snowballed from there. And after he had the surgery? Well, I didn’t see any point in the act at all anymore. I typically just gave in to keep the peace.”
“Thank you for telling me,” Azio said. “Now, sleep. I will ask more questions in the morning.”
He gently trailed his fingers over my hand then shifted his touch to my arm. The light strokes soothed me to sleep.
I moved a few times in my sleep, waking just enough to shift my position before sinking back into Azio’s comforting embrace. It was easy to miss the way dawn’s light crept into the room. It wasn’t easy to miss the sudden gush between my legs.
Instantly awake, my eyes flew open, and I had an up-close view of Azio’s neck.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” I said, not moving.
He grunted, lifted his arm, and removed the calf he’d hooked around my legs.
I didn’t get out of bed like a normal person. I log-rolled to the side and stood, keeping my legs tightly pinched together the entire time. Then, I walked from the knees down.
Azio said nothing behind me. I hoped that meant he had his eyes closed through the entire process.
Once I was alone in the bathroom, I confirmed what I already knew. Red rover had come over with a vengeance, which wasn’t too much of a surprise.
My periods were never kind to me. Three days of heavy flow and cramping with a side of boob aches, followed by three days of moderate flow. And as if that weren’t enough, I also enjoyed hair-trigger crying at stupid commercials and junk food cravings. However, it wasn’t all bad. It was also the one time I was actually horny—something Wayne had never wanted to take advantage of.
The typical disgruntlement and bad mood that came with my period wasn’t part of the package this time, though. I was elated. This was exactly what I’d been waiting for—the reset for the fertility countdown. I grinned as I did my best to clean myself up.
A knock on the bathroom door sent me into a panic.
“Are you okay, Terri? I smell blood.”
“Smell? You can smell this?”
“Are you hurt?”
“No. I’m fine.”
I reached for more toilet paper and paused when I realized cleaning up wasn’t the real problem. This was a house with two single guys in it, and I needed pads. Tampons. Something more than a wad of toilet paper.
“Actually, I have a non-life-threatening problem,” I said. “You wouldn’t happen to have anything on hand for a period, would you?”
“I know what you need,” Azio said in a rush. “Do not move. I will return quickly.”
I shook my head and looked around the bathroom. Where exactly did he think I was going to go? And more importantly, did he even know what a period was? I hoped so. Rather than wait on the toilet, I stripped and used the shower to wash up.
The heat usually helped with cramps, which hadn’t yet reared their ugly head.
As I enjoyed a leisurely soak, my mind wandered. In just six days, Azio and I should start having sex. My stomach gave a twist at the thought. Was I even ready? For a baby, yes. But for jumping into a relationship with another guy? I thought of Wayne and wondered if he was regretting his decision. What if he wanted to take it back and was trying to figure out a way to talk to me? That made me pause. Did I want to go back?
I’d meant every word of what I’d said last night to Azio. Wayne and I had drifted apart, but in ways I’d been too blind to see until now. We weren’t nice to each other anymore. Nothing over the top cruel, but we treated strangers better than we treated each other. Abrupt words. Little digs to make each other feel bad. Was that what I really wanted for the rest of my life? No.
Even if Wayne wanted me back, I wouldn’t go. But that didn’t mean I was ready to jump into something new.
I stuck my face in the shower and tried to be introspective about the choices I planned to make. Was it wise to rush into having a baby with Azio? Initially, I’d thought moving faster would secure my living arrangements. That was no longer the case. Azio and Groth had made my welcome abundantly clear. Why rush then? Why not wait a few months?
The infected were scary. And getting supplies would only be scarier.
Another knock on the door made me jump.
“I have some supplies for you. Can I come in and put them on the counter?”