I dropped into a crouch, startling all the fey, and focused on breathing through my lightheadedness.
Pick the small one,I mocked at myself. He’s less terrifying. You should have checked his pants first!
“I will wait outside,” Azio said, his softly spoken words conveying his confusion and blame for my panic.
Guilt speared me.
“Wait. Give me a moment.” He paused beside me, and I took a breath, then another. When my vision didn’t tunnel, I looked up at him. “I’d like you to carry me the rest of the way. Please.”
That thing in his too-tight pants twitched again. I couldn’t not notice. It was eye-level. But I managed to maintain eye contact regardless of what was happening in his pants.
I wasn’t trying to play favorites by asking Azio to carry me again. But I knew I shouldn’t ask Groth since he’d just carried me, and I was far from comfortable with asking anyone else even though they seemed nice enough. I wasn’t entirely sure I was comfortable with Azio carrying me.
Liar! I silently yelled at myself. Perversely, what I’d just witnessed only made me want him to carry me more. My feelings about his size remained unchanged. But I also found the evidence of his attraction to me downright flattering.
He offered his hand and helped me to my feet.
“Are you warm enough?”
“Yep. I’m warm.” I was pretty sure my face was on fire and didn’t think I’d survive if he wanted to touch my butt, too.
“Are you hungry?”
He motioned to one of the other fey who miraculously had the backpack from Warrensburg.
“I’m okay for now. I’d rather wait to eat until we get home.”
Azio grunted, and the fey shouldered the bag. All of the muscles in his chest and side flexed with the motion. I turned my attention to Azio’s torso, mentally comparing the two. Azio’s chest was a bit narrower but far more defined under his formfitting shirt.
Realizing I was staring yet again, I focused on his face and noted how intently he was watching me.
“Will you tell me what happened back there?” I asked, hoping to distract us both.
“Yes.”
He held out his arms, a signal he was ready for me. I moved closer and looped an arm around his shoulder as he picked me up.
I didn’t miss the way he leaned in and brushed his temple against my cheek in the process of lifting me. It was kind of sweet, actually. All the subtle touches were little reminders that he cared about me.
Once we were outside and running, he started explaining.
“The infected are growing less stupid and better at hiding. I think the one in the house was older and knew to summon more to try to get to you. She was still weak and slow compared to us. Nothing for you to worry about.”
“Will the infected be watching that area now? I heard from one of my housemates who goes on supply runs that the infected do that. They wait for us to come back.”
Azio shrugged, the move jostling me more firmly against his chest as he ran.
“That’s a yes, isn’t it?” I asked. “Nothing we’d gathered is that important. Don’t risk yourselves.”
He chuckled.
“Food is very important. We will return, and we will be fine. You will stay home.”
Like I ever wanted to leave again. The trip had served its purpose, though. I’d indirectly witnessed the carnage the fey could achieve and didn’t pass out. Every action today had been made to keep me safe. Why should I fear that? I shouldn’t. And while a little fear and doubt lingered, I knew I was one step closer.
Sighing, I turned my face into Azio's chest and lifted my hand to cover the place over his heart. It beat steadily under my palm, a reminder that he was a living, breathing person with thoughts and feelings like any other.
The trip home seemed to go faster than when we’d left. My butt appreciated it. By the time we cleared Tolerance’s wall, it felt like I had more ice flowing through my backside than blood.