Unwilling to push my point and upset him, I let go of his invasion of my privacy.
“Now, my good dreams are usually about the past. Simple moments that I’ll probably never see again, like going to work and talking with co-workers. Grocery shopping.” My heart started to flutter, and I forced myself to say the final one. “Having kids.”
He tilted his head, and although I couldn’t see him clearly, I felt studied.
“How many children do you want?”
“As many as I can have,” I said honestly. “I know it’s not safe. There are no doctors to help with complications and things out there that want to eat anything that moves. My head knows that. But my heart just wants a family.”
“But not with your human man.”
I shook my head slowly, feeling sad and bitter and scared.
“No. Not with Wayne. He made it clear years ago that he didn’t want kids.” I drew my knees up to my chest and picked at the blanket covering me. “In a way, it’s a relief he told me to leave. Maybe now I have a chance, you know?” I wasn’t sure if I was convincing Azio or myself that it was a good thing.
“You still miss him.”
“I was with Wayne for years. Since high school. He was familiar. It’s easy to miss what was familiar. But that doesn’t mean we were right or happy together.”
“And you want to be happy.”
“Doesn’t everyone?”
Azio grunted again, softer, and reached for the door.
“Sleep, Terri. You are safe.”
He closed the door, leaving me alone. Oddly, I didn’t feel safer, just lonely and sad.