“You have to believe me. It’s not what you think.”
A rage I’d never felt tore through me. “You want to know what I think?” I spun around to glare at him, causing some hair to land in my mouth. “I think you are a fucking liar and a cheat. You’ve been fucking Nicki, and it wasn’t enough to do it after hours. You needed to have real couple time,huh?”
“No! I would never—”
“And I’m the fucking fool over here wondering why my boyfriend isn’t trying to fuck me, isn’t making time to call me when he’s away. It’s because you were too busy with her.” My finger pointed in his direction, but I kept a safe distance from the bed, avoiding his hands that kept reaching out to me.
“Sasha—”
“No,Luca! I love you, and you fucking betrayed me! Is it because she looks like a fucking model? Because it sure as hell can’t be because of her wit and personality. Or is it because she’s daddy-approved? Tell me! Why the fuck did you do this to me?”
The bed squeaked as Luca shifted toward his suit jacket on the chair. His hands strained as they pulled out a felt box.
Pressing my back against the window, I blinked rapidly as my eyes filled with tears. “What the fuck is that?”
His chapped lips pulled into a small smile as he flipped open the lid. A diamond the size of a Chicklet sparkled at me. “An engagementring. I’ve been carrying it around for months, waiting for the right time.”
My fingernails dug into my palm. “And this is it? Do you honestly think that proposing will get you out of this . . . this—whatever this is?”I yelled.
Luca kept his hand extended, waiting for me to take the fucking ring.
Crossing my arms over my stomach, I tried to gather up all my strength. “Tell me, Luca. If this isn’t what it looks like, what is it?”
Finally, his hand fell along with his eyes. “I can’t tell you that,Sasha.”
I let out a sharp laugh, my head lolling to the side. “SoI’m just supposed to ignore the fact that you’ve been God knows where for the past few days? That if you hadn’t been shot being such a ‘gentleman,’I would’ve never known? Tell me, would you’veever told me?”
Staring at the ring, he shook his head.
“And will you tell me the whole truth now?”
Another slow headshake.
“One more chance, Luca, or I’m out the fucking door. Tell me what’s going on.” I pleaded withhim,no more strength left in my voice.
Beautiful brown eyes filled with tears looked back at me. “I love you, Sasha. I . . . I” A sob racked through him as he tried to get to me, but the wires and cords kept him tethered to the bed. “Please . . . I just can’t . . . you have to believe me.”
Slowly, I moved toward the door. With each step, Luca became more frantic. The machines beeped. His words became punctuated with hiccups and sobs as he tried to pull himself free of the wires. Two nurses rushed past me and tried to restrain him, but his pain-filled eyes never left me.He thrashed against their gentle hold, and the two women shouted for help. Twoburlynurses ran in and held him down. They added a syringe of something to his fluids bag, and his movements slowed. Sluggishly, he whimpered and quietly begged me to stay.
“Sorry.”
Tearing my eyes from Luca, I ran from the room. I didn’t stop running until I made it to my car. Somehow, I made it home without crashing.
* * *
“Taking or leaving?” Ashley held up my stupid wine glasses.
“Box’em, and I’ll have the movers get them. I really just need to have my clothes and beauty shit right now. The rest I’ll stack to be picked up this weekend.”
“10-4 chief.”
Adriana stood in the kitchen doorway with a garbage bag full of clothes. “Sasha, I’mgoing toput your winter clothes in my guest room. I’ll make sure the movers get them.”
I absentmindedly nodded as I jammed shot glasses in paper.
“I still can’t believe Adriana is helping you move out.”
When I looked up,Ashwas staring down at the pile of paintings I had already taken off the walls. “Yeah, well, she still thinks I should wait and talk to him. But what is there to talk about? Worst-case scenario, he is fucking Nicki, and I leave. Best-case scenario, something else is happening, and he doesn’t trust me enough to tell me, and I leave.”