I nodded and he raced upstairs. The shower started, and I allowed my mind to wander into dirty little places I hadn’t ventured into for a while. While Jesse cleaned himself, I poured us a couple of glasses of red wine. Was it too late for a little drink? Nah, it was Christmas Eve, or rather, it was now Christmas Day. However, rather than fill to a normal amount, I halved it, just enough for a little toast, and set them on the coffee table.
A freshJesse fell in beside me on the couch and reached for his glass, lifting it for me.
I mirrored his action, and the gentle clink filled the air.
He took a sipand licked his lips. “Merry Christmas, Mona.”
“Same to you.” The words were right there on the tip of my tongue, but I just couldn’t let them slip out.
“Are you going to finish opening it?”
I stared at the pretty package. “Not sure.” It suddenly felt heavy as I lifted it back into my hands. “Maybe.”
“I can leave, if you’dprefer. I didn’t want to interrupt.”
But Ididn’t want him to take off. After everything I’d shared with him, it was like he needed to be here when I finally lifted the lid. “No. Stay.”
I snuggled into the depths of the couch, and Jesse draped his arms over my shoulders. He smelled good, a sultry spicy scent. Whatever it was, the deeper I inhaled, the calmer I became.
For good measure, I took another sip of wine and swallowed down the fear. This was it. The last gift. My wine glass wobbled as I set it on the table, and my hand trembled as I pulledoff the lid.
Chapter Fourteen
Inside the box, was a tissue-wrapped ornament, but that wasn’t what caught my eye. Tucked into the lid was a folded note written on blue paper.
If my hands had been shaking before, that had nothing on what they were doing now. Tropical storms moved things less.
Jesse’s hand squeezed my shoulder. “I’ll give you a minute.”
I put my hand on hispajama-covered leg. “Stay. Please. I insist.”
Inhaling, I counted to three before I released my breath and unfolded the note. My eyes fell upon the wordsMy Dearest Monaand the tears fell out like a flash flood.
Her beautiful script scrawled out a short message about how I changed her life when I made her a mom; the best thing to have ever happened andshe hoped someday when I had a child, I’d understand that kind of undying love. Every day she was proud of me, for giving more of myself than I had to spare, for taking care of Dad and Lily and her. For finding strength in the darkest of places and still seeing the light on the heaviest of days.
I chuckled through tears as I read, it was typical Mom to mess up the metaphors.
She wished me unending joy and happiness and to find the one who fills my heart with love and desire, the kind of person who you miss instantly when they are out of sight and can’t wait to be back in their arms. The kind of contentment that only comes with finding your soulmate and passion.
Her final written words were:Never settle for less than you deserve, for you deserve the very best.
“Oh, Mom.” My heart ached as the tears continued to rain down my cheeks.
Jess squeezed me tight, and I pulled a touch of his strength to wipe my face with the back of my hand. I folded the note back into place andtenderly unwrapped the tissue paper, pulling out the glass ball. Inside the ornament were rolled pieces of paper, and on the outside was the wordMemoriesand the year before my birth until her last year. Had she written all her favourite memories of us throughout the years? There were so many miniature scrolls.
I held it in front of the twinkling tree lights and stared.
Jesse whispered, “She’s always with you.”
I tipped my head against him and nestled the treasure into the box as a wave ofbittersweet peacefulness settled over me. Her words replayed over and over in my mind, until the dawn of the new day broke across the horizon, brightening the living room.
When I awoke, it was clearly morning. Somehow, I was covered in a blanket, and Jesse’s lap had been my pillow. As I stretched, I opened my eyes and stared into the sleepy face looking down on me.
“Morning.” His voice was groggy and raw, and he cleared the frog away. “How’d you sleep?”
I pushed myself into a sitting position and wiped at the tiny crust of dried drool.The picture of attractiveness. Not wanting to chance breathing dragon’s breath onto him, I turned my head and stretched out my neck. “It was good.”
Better than good. One of the best night’s sleep I’ve had in ages, but I was sure it wasn’t all due to Jesse. Part if it was because the burden was lifted. At least that was my thought.