Chloe had mentioned Charlie and that she didn't have to take his anger. It wasn't that he disagreed with her. He knew he was treating her unfairly; he just couldn’t stop.
But he wanted to.
For the first time since their son died, he didn'twantto be angry with Chloe.
If she was seeking professional help, was that his fault? Had he pushed her too far? Had he been too mean, too selfish, too cruel?
He wanted to apologize, but a simple sorry didn't seem like enough. How could he make up for the way he had treated her?
He didn't deserve her forgiveness.
He had taken out his grief and anger and helplessness on her at a time when she had needed him. He hadn’t been there for her. He had turned his back on the woman he loved when she had needed him the most, and he was ashamed of it.
Fin had been planning on asking her to marry him. From the second she told him she was pregnant, he’d known that she was the only woman for him. Well, he’d known it long before then, but that was the moment he decided he wanted to make it official. He’d bought the ring, intended to propose after the birth of their child.
Only, then the baby died, and everything had gotten so messed up that he was no longer sure it was possible to put all the pieces back together again.
He had failed the two people it was his job to protect.
Chloe’s accident was his fault.
He should have driven her that day. He usually did when it rained since Chloe didn't particularly like driving in wet conditions. But he’d been busy. Anxious to get to work for some reason he could no longer even remember.
Because of his selfishness, she had lost control of the car and crashed it.
Because of his selfishness, his son had died.
All this time when he’d been angry with Chloe, he was really just angry with himself.
Her heart had broken when their baby died, and he had donethat to her. How could he forgive himself for that?
Fin needed time to think.
Chloe wanted to get back together, and he didn't know what he wanted. When she had first walked away, it had seemed like a blessing in disguise. She knew his past and how many other people had walked away from him, and yet she’d done it anyway. That had given him the perfect outlet for all the anger that was building inside him. Being angry with Chloe certainly beat being angry at himself.
But he couldn’t lie anymore.
Not to Chloe and not to himself.
He just wasn't ready to face her yet.
“Thanks for coming with me.” Taylor reached for his hand and tried to entwine their fingers as they walked through the halls of the FBI building.
“Yeah, sure.”
He hadn’t wanted to come with her, but when Tom had called and asked for Taylor to come down and identify a suspect, she had begged and cried and pleaded until he caved and agreed to come. Eric had played the guilt trip thing again, and although her family was in the car waiting to take her home afterward, he was the one coming inside with her.
At least she was going home now. Physically, she was growing stronger, and her broken leg was healing well, so there was no reason for her to be in the hospital any longer. Fin hoped that now that she would be at home with her parents, she wouldn’t feel like she needed him anymore. He had enough to worry about with Chloe without being the only one who calmed Taylor down.
“Fin.”
He turned and saw Tom waving at him. Chloe was standing behind her partner and the look on her face when she saw him was anything but pleased. Trying to apologize to her was goingto be even harder than he’d thought.
“Thanks for coming down here,” Tom said to him and Taylor when they joined the agents.
“Did you catch him?” Taylor asked timidly.
“We think so, but he’s denying everything, so we need you to see if you can pick him out of a lineup,” Tom explained.