I shouldn’t have written her. I knew it was a mistake even before I started typing, but I couldn’t stop myself. I never seem to be able to with Lauren. I needed to know she’s okay. And if she weren’t? I probably wouldn’t have been able to stop myself from catching the first plane back to LA.
Deciding there isn’t much to do about it now, I turn back to the music in front of me, the same song Lauren caught me singing in LA, and I’ve barely managed to advance an inch since, Still stuck on what comes after that last verse. I pick up my Gibson Archtop Acoustic guitar and start singing.
“When I grow up
I want to forget
Everything
That life threw in my way
And forced me to climb
But then I’d also forget about you.”
I stop and frown. It feels better than the crap I’ve been writing so far, but it still doesn’t sit entirely right for some reason, even though it’s true. I know in my head that this is how a song about Naomi should end, but even as I think that, my eyes wander to my phone, and Lauren invades my thoughts.
“Dammit.” I sigh, pushing the guitar off my lap onto the sofa and throwing myself back. I squeeze my eyes shut and rub them with my thumb and forefinger before getting up, pulling on my shoes and black leather jacket, and walking to the Velvet Keg, a little gem of a bistro pub Brian and Zoe stumbled upon when Mac dumped Zoe after his mom died.
At least they found their way back to each other. I smile despite the despair, thinking how beautiful Zoe looked in her boho-chic white dress and the flowers in her purple-streaked brown hair.Lauren would have loved that look.
I mentally groan at myself, pushing the door of the pub open and claiming an empty barstool. I signal the bartender to get me a beer. What I really want is a whiskey, but I hold myself back. I need to unwind, not derail.
I look around as I wait. The place is pretty full, considering it’s just 11 PM, but not jam-packed, and the food looks and smells delicious. I start wondering if maybe I should eat, considering I haven’t touched food today. I haven’t eaten since yesterday morning, coming to think about it.
Dammit.
Thanking the bartender, I barely manage a sip of my stout before someone sits to my left. I look up from my pint to find familiar bright gray cat-eyes staring back at me.
“Maddie?” I frown. “How’d you know where…?” I stop mid-question when I realize the answer myself. “Right, never mind. Forget I asked.”
“Em and Davey have been worried about you, so they asked me to keep an eye on you,” she explains and tucks her wavy buttercream hair behind her ear. Lifting her hand to get the bartender’s attention and ordering a pint for herself, her signature thin metal bracelets jingle as they clang together on her slender wrist.
“So, you hacked my phone?” I pin her down with my gaze, but Maddie doesn’t even seem phased. I guess she’s used to invading people’s privacy, being a world-class hacker that’s been working freelance for various government agencies and financial institutions for years now. Not that we ever say it out loud.
“I stayed out of your private stuff. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t end up belly-flopping a Camaro into a ditch.” She takes a sip from her beer and turns a hard gaze at me. “Again.”
“I wasn’t planning on getting blackout drunk and behind the wheel, Maddie. I just wanted a damn beer,” I say in a soft voice, not even able to be mad at her because she’s the one who tracked me down that night and probably saved my life when I flipped that car. That was the night I realized I needed to get my shit together.
“I don’t know what happened in LA that got you so out of sorts, Mikey,” she starts, and I raise an eyebrow. “I’m serious. I was just tracking your GPS, I swear.”
“Okay, okay, I believe you.” I lift my glass to my lips, but I don’t feel like drinking anymore, so I put it back down.
“Anyway, whatever it was, get over it.”
“Great talk, Madeline,” I snip, throwing a couple of bills on the bar and all but stomping out of the pub.
“You’re grouchy,” Maddie observes as she falls into step with me, linking her arm through mine.
“Pigheaded song won’t get written,” I grumble in response. She shoots me a look and shakes her head but leaves well enough alone.
We wander through Boston in silence for a while, Maddie letting me get lost in my thoughts without interrupting.
We were always close. After Maddie and Emily’s mom had sudden cardiac arrest due to congenital heart disease not too long after giving birth to Emily, Beatrice and Evan, Phoebe and Brian’s parents, took the girls under their wings. They didn’t have any children of their own yet, and Trent, Evan’s twin, was falling apart after losing his wife. Since my mom had just had us and Beaisher bestie, we grew up together. As close as we would have been, we became even closer under the tragic circumstances.
Maddie is barely two years older than us, but since Em and Davey always had a special bond even before it developed into a romantic one, Maddie and I grew even closer, and for all intents and purposes, she’s my sister.
Eventually, we make it to Public Garden, stopping to stare at the moon reflecting off the lagoon.