He bristled. “That’s right.”
Adam held up a hand. “Again, no judgment here. But if you don’t have a woman in your life, maybe that’s the lack you’re feeling? Most men were designed to have a partner. Not all men, of course. God obviously wants some men to stay single for his purposes, but I think most of us benefit from having someone to do life with.” He looked at Brent expectantly.
What did he want him to say? “I don’t have a woman in my life.”
After a long pause, Adam asked, “Do you want one?”
Not really. He’d wanted Sammy. But the real Sammy, not the alcoholic one. He’d only been on two dates since his divorce, and they’d both been disasters. Neither of those women had been Sammy. Brent took a deep breath. “I guess if I’m honest, I’m still hung up on my ex-wife.”
Adam did not appear surprised by this revelation. “Can I ask what caused the divorce?”
Booze. Her addiction caused it. Her unwillingness to do anything about that addiction. But he felt bad badmouthing her to a pastor. “It was complicated. It just didn’t work out.”
After another long pause, Adam asked, “Did you initiate the divorce, or did she?”
“I did, but I had good reason.”
“Okay. I wasn’t trying to say that you didn’t. I’m just wondering if that might be the root of your unrest. You’ve found Jesus. Jesus is making you whole. He’s putting the pieces of the puzzle together so that you can learn who you really are, and as you’re coming together, there is a piece missing.” He leaned back in his chair. “I don’t know. It’s only a guess. But I would pray about it. Maybe your ex-wife is the missing piece.”
The missing piece that explained his missing peace, he thought sardonically, and then it washed over him so fast that it made him sweat.
Adam was right.
He was missing Sammy.
And that was truly bad news because he could never get her back. The Sammy he’d fallen in love with, the one that he was now missing, was gone, buried underneath her addiction.
“What is it? What are you not telling me?”
Brent took a shaky breath. “I don’t want to badmouth Sammy, but she’s an alcoholic. I didn’t want to be married to a woman who loved alcohol more than she loved her husband.”
“But you still love her?”
Of course he did. But he didn’t want to say it.
“Are you still in touch with her?”
Brent shook his head. “No kids. No reason to be.”
“Where does she live?”
“Hartport.”
“And have you ever considered reconciling?”
He’d thought about it sometimes, daydreamed about it. But it wasn’t realistic. “I love her, but I still don’t want to be married to an alcoholic, and even if I could do it, I doubt she’d take me back.” His eyes fell to his hands. “I was pretty mean in the end.”
Adam watched him for a moment. “I won’t pretend to know what God has planned for your life. But if she’s battling alcoholism, than I think it would be a good idea for you to pray for her. Whether or not you get back together, I doubt you want her to suffer from that addiction. And then maybe also pray about the relationship. Ask God if he wants you to try to reconcile. See if that idea brings you any peace.”
Brent stood, thanked the pastor, and then walked out to his truck thinking that this little chat had been a giant waste of time. Reconciliation was not a possibility. He would pray against her addiction, but he was not going to pray for reconciliation.
He pointed his old truck toward home. And with every mile, the more he thought about being married to Sammy again, the more peace he felt.