I fan myself. “Phew, boys. I don’t know if I can do this.”
I study each of their handsome faces and they study me right back.
They don’t back down and nor do they back away. The heat intensifies and the walls…are they getting closer?
“Why are you guys not sweating?” They must have been through so much together. Seen so much. Shared so much.
“Have you done this with other women? Before me, obviously. Shared them on stage?” I don’t know what I want them to answer. I mean, come on. They have to be over ten years my senior. They have pasts. I was the only virgin in the room the other night, for crying out loud and it didn’t feel like it was their first time sharing.
Belle, sometimes you need to shut up.
I mentally rake myself over fiery coals. I want to smack my forehead for asking a question I have no right to ask. “I won’t blame you if you don’t want to answer.” Shades of embarrassment claw over me and settle in my cheeks. I laser a quick look at them and dart my gaze away just as quickly.
Never have I ever wanted to be lied to more in my life. I hold my breath waiting for their answer. “Ya know what…” I dash a hand through the air, changing my mind. “I’m stupid for asking. Don’t answer that. You don’t owe me anything.”
Alone their scents are delicious, but all three together it’s mind-numbing and toxic to the senses.
“Let’s blame my momentary lapse of judgment on my nerves, okay.” I drag my bottom lip between my teeth to help me shut up already.
“Why are you guys not talking?”
Gage pulls on my hand and I land against his hard chest. Our robes are the only thing between me and the hard feel of his aroused cock. I will be totally up front with you. Silk does nothing to hide a man’s cock when it’s that thick and ready.
My core clenches and suddenly the thought of taking him, all three of them again, doesn’t sound as bad of an idea as it did a second ago.
My lips part as I lift my gaze to his. “Gage, help me,” I beg softly. “I want this, but I’m scared.”
“I plan to, beautiful.” He moves my hair from my face with a gentle touch a man of his size is not known for and I fall deeper into his embrace.
“We all plan on helping you. You’re not alone.” Gage’s lips crash to mine and suddenly I’m lost in his heat, his taste, and the tumbling feeling of being lifted.
Aziel’s hands on my hips anchor me in place around Gage’s waist. I lean back into his secure embrace. Pinned between them I turn to Rush who steps in. My robe has opened at the top to reveal my bare breasts. But instead of going in to work me into a feverish state of craving, he parts my robe further and kisses my neck. He works his way up my chin until his mouth takes the place of Gage’s.
Rush’s lips on mine are softer than Gage’s demanding ones. Rush breaks away and murmurs, “We’re with you the whole time. You never have anything to fear.”
“I know. I’ve just never done anything like this.” I look between Gage and Rush before turning my gaze to meet Aziel’s soft blue eyes.
“That makes four of us,” he says and those knots in my stomach loosen with a few falling away. My mouth opens. “Oh?”
Aziel’s hand comes to rest on my cheek. “We could torture you a little bit more, but no. We’ve never shared on Club Sin’s stage before, sweetheart. You do look stunning turning green with jealousy, though. I’m going to remember that when your ass is taking my cock.” The dark promise wraps his words in sinful temptation.
Not ‘this is our first time sharing’ I notice, but now isn’t the time to root around in their histories. And I don’t think I am entitled to any answers at the moment anyway.
I turn a few shades darker than the red I’m already sporting and what I am about to admit. “Anal sex is something else I’ve never done.” They must think I’m the most sheltered, inexperienced woman they’ve ever met.
His expression turns from turned on to worried. “Do you want to back out, sweetheart?”
Rush tips my chin to him. “Just say the word and we will rip up the contracts instead of signing them. Raja will understand.”
The corner of my lips finds itself between my teeth again. “I don’t think so,” I answer after a seconds-long pause.
I think I physically see them all relax.
“We need to hear the words yes or no.” Gage’s tone doesn’t leave much wiggle room. He’s right. I either have to know if I want this or not. My brother was shunned for wanting such an unorthodox union between him, his partners and their shared wife. I was the first to tell him to go after what he wanted in life and don’t look back. Those around him would either accept him or they would eventually fall to the side so he could live his life his way.
He worried all the time our family would turn their backs on him. And they did for a time. Then our father went to prison for his stupidity and that put my brother back on the map for our family.
I don’t ever want to be in that position. I don’t want to live in fear of what others think, what others believe my life should look like. Not that anything is forever. Neither Gage, Aziel or Rush look like long-term kinds of men. I’m okay with that. I think. Either way, I am going to force myself to stay in the now and not worry about tomorrow. I am going to cherish tonight with all of me.