“We had a deal, Josie. You don’t want to make that deal anymore? Because there’s a lot of men risking their lives so this can be pulled off.”
I feel a pang of guilt. I know it would have been easier for them all if they’d just left me on the train tracks and let the train run me over. They’d probably all be camped out somewhere nice and remote, counting their loot and planning their next raid on the Imperium. I fucked up their lives. I made them all targets, even more than they already were. And now I’m mad because the outlaw who bedded me doesn’t want anything more from me.
Orion’s palm is still whipping against my cheeks, but I’ve stopped arguing. There’s no point. I am small and insignificant and alone.
I don’t know if it is the spanking or the self pity which makes the tears start to flow. Maybe it’s both.
There’s a sting in my ass that is so damn embarrassing, the heat of my skin contrasting with the cool of the forest air, the repeated landing of Orion’s palm jolting me over his thigh time and time again with those crisp smacks.
My sniffles are pathetic. I try to hide them, but it’s hard to stop when the act of crying brings relief and release from the tension I’ve been carrying since the morning I woke up after we slept together and realized what he’d said and meant.
“Tell me what’s goin’ on in that head of yours,” he says, landing a hard slap which catches both my cheeks. “I know things ain’t been right since we were together. You havin’ regrets?”
“I’m not the one who seemed to have regrets, Orion.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I can’t even begin to voice the thoughts inside my head, and when I try, all that comes out are more tears. Tears and tears streaming down my face, turning my soft whimpering cries into outright sobs.
“Whoa, whoa,” he says, tipping me up onto my feet and bending down, his hands on my shoulders, his face even with mine. “What’s going on? You sure it’s not yer…”
“If you say anything about time of the month, I will slap you all over again,” I sniff.
“What is it then, and don’t threaten me, missy.”
I take a few deep breaths, try to gather my thoughts and regain some dignity, which is not easy with my britches still down and my blazing hot ass bared to the world. Maybe I can express this maturely, in a way he’ll understand, one that still leaves room for an adult discussion…
“You don’t want me,” I wail.
“What do you mean I don’t want you?” He cups my face in his hands and uses his thumbs to wipe the tears from my cheeks on both sides. It’s such a gentle gesture, but I can feel the heat in his right hand where he used it to whip my ass.
It’s too late to hide now. I’m breaking down and I can’t keep the truth inside any longer. Three days of staying quiet and trying to swallow the sense of rejection those few words sparked inside me have taken their toll.
“You told me it didn’t mean anything!”
“What?”
“That’s what you said. You said having sex with me was meaningless.”
“Oh.” His eyes widen with understanding, becoming an even more intense blue. “No. You’ve got the wrong idea, Josie. That’s not what I meant.”
“It’s what you said.”
“Alright, well, I know those might have been the words that came out of my mouth, but they ain’t what I meant. I was just trying to tell you that I didn’t expect you to give up your whole future for me just because we’d slept together. I was trying to be a nice guy.”
“Nice guy doesn’t really suit you, Orion.”
“I guess it doesn’t,” he agrees. “You could have just talked to me instead of snapping up a storm that ended with your ass red.”
“No, I couldn’t. It was too humiliating.”
“Whereas this is just so much better,” he winks before scooping me up into his arms and holding me tight. His rough face presses against my neck and his lips murmur against my skin. “I want you, Josie. Don’t you worry about that. Now come on. I’ve got a surprise for you.”
He keeps me in his arms and carries me through the woods. The horses follow, I guess they’ve got nothing better to do.
“Wow,” I breathe as we break through the trees. There certainly is a surprise waiting, a fern lined lake with a waterfall pouring into it from a cliff high above. This is a little piece of paradise. It doesn’t seem to even belong on this world.
There’s something like a path through the water, an area where the rocks are high beneath the liquid, and we can walk there, our feet getting wet, but nothing else. Orion lets the horses go loose and they begin to graze on the water nymphs skating across the surface.