“Felix, is this crystal?” he asks.
Felix smiles, delighted that it’s an easy task. File that under things I appreciate about Charlie: he makes sure every person feels seen. Finding out Felix’s name and treating him like a person was a small action that Felix seems to appreciate.
“Only if you ask for crystal specifically. Would you prefer that I change your glasses out?” Felix offers, already reaching for our glasses.
I pull mine back out of reach with a shake of my head. Charlie laughs.
“No, not at all, just a curiosity. Don’t trouble yourself.”
“Of course, Mr. Breckenridge,” Felix says before disappearing back into the galley.
“Are you satisfied?” Charlie asks. The teasing tone is starting to wane, turning husky.
“Never,” I say.
He looks like he wants more. Like he wants to reach out and take my hand or maybe even kiss me, but we’re in flux. Neither of us knows where our relationship stands. Not that we have talked about it at all; his disappearing act only made me feel more unsettled.
Charlie checks his watch. “We have two more hours, might as well see if there is a movie you want to watch.” He gestures at the screen in front of me. “The glory of losing your memory means you can rewatch all these things for the first time again. I almost wish I could re-watchInfinity WarandEndgameagain.”
“Infinity WarandEndgame?” I ask and he sighs.
He knows I don’t remember, but it still surprises him when I forget about major events in the last five years, like how we wound up with a reality star for a president.
“Yeah, theAvengers?” he asks, concerned that maybe I don’t know who they are.
My mind casts out looking for any memories I have of the superhero movies. “Yeah, I think the last one I saw had that robot in it.”
Charlie shudders. “Well, I know what we’re doing when we get back to New York. I’m locking you in my apartment and we’re watching ALL of theAvengersmovies. Pick something else to watch now. I still have to send a few more emails before the flight ends.”
I pick a comedy based on a TV show from the 90s with a ton of lifeguards and can’t help laughing out loud. A few of the pop culture references go over my head, but I still enjoy it deeply. Every so often, I catch Charlie peeking at me out of the corner of his eye, smiling as I laugh.
It’s strange to think, but I am grateful that of all the people in New York City, Charlie was the one in the cab that hit me. He’s given me a whole new life, one I never imagined myself living, and it’s not just the nightly takeout or the swoon-worthy views of Central Park at dusk. It’s having someone to share my life with. Even if he isn’t my partner, he is my friend. This life we have come to share, I cherish so,somuch.
The announcement that we are beginning our descent startles me. Charlie tries to send off a few more emails before Felix reminds him to put his laptop away.
“So, where are we staying?” I’m curious about what the plan is for San Francisco.
“Well, we still have another two flights.” Charlie says, finally relaxing and closing his eyes for a moment.
“You’re joking,” I say, not liking the idea of being stuck in a tin can for much longer. I’m not uneasy about flying, but the thought of doing it for much longer is exhausting.
“Nope, we have a night in San Francisco and our next flight leaves at noon. I booked us a hotel in the city before our next flight.”
“And then what?” I ask.
The sound of the landing gear dropping grates my nerves. I reach out and grab Charlie's hand without thinking. My eyes slam closed, the unease working through my system. He threads his fingers between mine, letting me squeeze as hard as I need.
“I’m sorry, I’m just…” I trail off, trying not to think about the landing. It’s irrational, but that’s what fear is. It’s the loss of control over what’s happening as we descend that terrifies me.
“It’s okay,” Charlie reassures me, not letting go even once we have safely touched down. I keep waiting for him to let go, but he doesn’t; he waits until I’m ready to let him go.
Chapter 6
“No,”Isayemphatically,shaking my head.
Before us is a small propeller plane that Charlie wants me to get on. Our stay in San Francisco was short before we got on another flight to Tahiti. I’m about to get on a plane for the third time in thirty-six hours and my heels are dug so far into the ground that dragging me will rip up asphalt. We’re standing on the tarmac, watching people board ahead of us for the first time on this trip from Tahiti to Bora Bora. There is no first class because the flight is under an hour and the plane has about ten seats. We’re about to board a puddle jumper and I am terrified.
“No,” I repeat, shaking my head again. “I have seen drones with better engines. I will not get on that plane.”