Dirty with soot, he climbed into his pickup and drove back to the house, doing the mathematical calculation in his head. He wondered if Jazzy would mind staying while he took a shower and cleaned up. He hated to ask. He owed her as it was.
He climbed the back porch steps, scraping grime off his boots. Heard music seeping through the door. “Jingle Bells” played at an elevated volume, along with the heartwarming sounds of Jazzy and Trinity singing along.
The happy sound brought a smile to his face. The fire hadn’t affected them one bit, thank heavens. Claire would have been wringing her hands and pacing the floor, in between frantic texts. Immediately, he felt disloyal for thinking about his late wife’s negative traits. Heaven knows, he had his faults. Living with generalized anxiety disorder had been rough on Claire.
And from time to time, him too.
Shaking off those thoughts, Roan pushed open the back door. The house smelled as good as it sounded. Jazzy must have found the Christmas-scented candles because the fragrance of gingerbread and cinnamon crowded out the stench of his clothing. A weird ache stabbed him dead center in his chest. He must have breathed in too much smoke.
“Daddy!” Trinity came running into the mudroom, arms outstretched, face beaming. “Come see, come see!”
She slipped her little hand in his and starteddragging him toward the living room and a helpless grin spread across his face. There was nothing in the world he loved more than to see his daughter happy.
They rounded the corner and Roan couldn’t believe his eyes. He halted, and dang if his mouth didn’t drop open to see his living room transformed.
The eight-foot artificial Christmas tree was up and fully decorated. The Christmas village figurines that Claire had loved to collect were set up on the coffee table exactly the way his late wife used to display them. He was beginning to think Jazzy was a mind-reading psychic and then he remembered his wife had created a layout chart for her collection. He hadn’t decorated last year. It had been too soon, his heart still too tender. He and Trinity had celebrated Christmas with his parents instead. Two stockings hung from the fireplace mantel, his and Trinity’s. The middle of the mantel, where Claire’s should have hung, was empty.
The weird ache in his chest sharpened.
“Look it, Daddy, look it.” Trinity flitted around the room, her eyes wide and shiny. “Jazzy fixedeverything.”
Roan’s gaze found Jazzy, who was on a step stool, leaning over to add the star to the top of the tree. She had indeed fixed everything. Why then did he feel a rush of hot emotions pumping through his veins? Fear, irritation, and something else.
Something he couldn’t put his finger on.
She finished, then straightened and glanced overat him. “Did I do it right? Is this how it usually looks?”
“Isn’t it bootiful, Daddy?” Trinity clutched her hands together and lifted them to her chin in a gesture so adorable, his anger instantly deflated.
“Yes,” he said, finding Jazzy’s gaze again. “Very beautiful.”
And that was the problem, wasn’t it? Jazzy had slipped right in and taken over. It had been a kind gesture. As generous and caring as the sweet blonde standing in front of him.
Jazzy moved over to her phone on the coffee table and silenced the music she’d been playing. “How bad was the fire?” she asked.
“Scorched the back forty,” he said. “No people or animals hurt. Everything’s fine.”
“Thank heavens. I was worried about you.”
“I can’t believe you did all this.” He waved at the room. His voice came out gruffer than he intended.
“Should I not have?”
“No. It’s fine, it’s great, it’s...” Roan searched for the right words to express the tension in his body.
“I crossed a boundary.”
“No. Well, maybe.” He pulled his mouth downward. “A boundary I didn’t even know I had.”
“I get it,” she murmured. “Decorating was something you and your wife did together.”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you for your patience and understanding with my overexuberance. I just thought Trinity needed a little Christmas magic.”
“She does and it’s not you. You didn’t do anything wrong, Jazzy.”
“Should I take the decorations down?”