It wasn’t lost on him that he’d thrown shade at Dez to deflect the annoyance and frustration Zakk had sent his way. It was the wrong way to handle it. All of this felt wrong.
“He better not be ditching us,” Riley muttered, but there was no heat to the man’s words, just a quiet regret and a hint of fear.
“I doubt he’s going far, considering he’s not even taking his guitar,” Tripp remarked, wanting to take the words back as soon as he said them. The echo of a conversation he’d had with Sky played through his mind, reminding him that Dez had no qualms about leaving things behind.
He took what he could carry, left the rest for us to ship back for him, including one of his guitarsSky said.Honestly, we didn’t even know he’d ditched us until he never came back. No note, no text, he was just gone. We made a ton of phone calls trying to make sure he wasn’t smeared over the highway somewhere, especially after…We’d already seen what one wreck could do. The thought of him on the road alone, or hurt and laid up in a hospital somewhere…
The remnants of that terror had still been in Sky’s voice as he told the story.We didn’t want to freak his uncle out, but after 48 hours and a missed show with absolutely no word from him, we called, and found out he was somewhere in Minnesota, already halfway across the country from where he’d left us, with no intention on coming back, or returning home. His uncle said he intended to wander awhile and wanted to know what happened, since all Dez told him was that we didn’t need him anymore, which was bullshit. We needed him back desperately, still do.
“Damn, you’re all up early, what’s…”
Joy, now Zakk was out here, and what the fuck was he going to think?
“Winter left already?”
“Yeah.”
“And Dez is, what…going after him?”
“Dunno,” Riley supplied.
“Great,” Zakk snapped, his words partially swallowed up by the roar of Dez’s bike as he took off. “I left him a note that we needed to have a band meeting and this is what he does!”
“Did you put a time on it?” Tripp asked, shocked when Zakk whirled on him, sputtering. Several emotions flashed across his face, one after the other, from outrage, to annoyance, to downright embarrassment, his cheeks a brilliant red as he paused to think about what Tripp had asked. Finally, Zakk stood rubbing the back of his neck, mouth opening and closing with no sound coming out.
“I…might have neglected that part,” Zakk mumbled.
“Then don’t freak out,” Tripp said. “Look at the sky, it’s amazing. If I had a bike, I’d be tempted to go for a ride too.”
“Yeah only, you’d have taken me with,” Zakk pointed out.
Tripp saw Riley’s cheeks color a little, even as he ducked his head. “Maybe he had no reason to take me.”
“Excuse me?” Zakk remarked, whirling around to face him.
“Just that…well…bandmates shouldn’t date. It has the potential to go too far sideways and fuck everything up, so, we’re taking a break before anything else can go wrong.”
“I see.”
“I don’t,” Tripp blurted, surprising himself with his words as much as he shocked them.
“Excuse me?” Riley said, shaking off his confusion far easier than Zakk seemed to.
“Look, it’s no secret me and Dez butt heads, mostly ‘cause I go out of my way to provoke him,” Tripp admitted. “But I never meant for it to cause so much chaos in your lives.”
“None of this is on you,” Zakk said. “He chose to only give us part of the story, then added to the issue by separating himself from us the moment the truth came out.”
Sighing heavily, Tripp felt even worse, knowing that the only person Dez had to talk to had just left and Dez was probably feeling shitty and alone right now. He might even be a little scared and uncertain of what to do with this newest rejection.
“Don’t you think he deserves the chance to talk about it?” Tripp suggested, hoping to undo even a little of what he’d caused.
“That’s what the meeting is for. If he shows up for it,” Zakk commented. “Either way, this isn’t your problem. It’s ours. You get to deal with your band when they get here Saturday. Until then, let us sort out Tattered Angel, and what, if any future there’s going to be for us after Rocktoberfest.”
“Fair enough,” Tripp said, eager to restore the peace. Zakk was right. He’d already done enough. The last thing he needed was Zakk to resent him or worse, end things with him the way it sounded like they were ending things with Dez. And yet, the moment the thought entered his mind, he wanted to punch himself in the mouth for being so selfish and such a god damned coward for thinking of his own skin instead of the guy he’d practically thrown to the wolves, all for making a bad, and seemingly emotional decision.
As they turned to head in, Tripp found himself hoping Dez did come back and that there would be an opportunity to apologize for putting this whole mess in motion. More than anything, Tripp hoped nothing happened to Dez out there alone, because he seriously doubted Winter…or Zakk…would ever forgive him.
Chapter 23