Solving the mystery of you.
All the things they were willing to go through, obstacles they were willing to push past if they were given one whiff of a reason to believe it was what the other person wanted them to do.
Was there a chance, or was it all a pipe dream destined to become a nightmare?
Were there two sides with stars in their eyes or was there one person relentlessly pining while the other was biding their time until someone better came along?
Which one of them said that?
Zakk’s fingers stilled. He met Dez’s gaze over the tablet and pondered the same idea.
“Sometimes I think it would be better if we had fallen for each other,” Zakk whispered. “At least with you…”
“It’d be safe,” Dez said softly. “None of the fire and fury you feel with Tripp.”
“We don’t know that! Besides, too much fire will get you burned every time,” Zakk replied. “Tired of waking up with my heart in ashes.”
“But you love falling asleep with your fingers singed.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Zakk asked, only half because he wanted an answer. Mostly, he was still sorting out notes, building different ones trying to tell a story with the melody.
Dez’s smirk, wicked but restrained, clued him in on what he’d missed.
“Is it worth it though?” Zakk mused. “Hot sex is amazing but if it leaves you empty when it’s over, then isn’t it more like poison?”
“I don’t know. I don’t usually get that far,” Dez admitted.
Snorting bitterly, Zakk had to admit there might have been something in the whole need for emotional entanglements before being able to heat up the sheets.
Only…
Emotions were exactly the problem he was facing with Tripp. If not for them he’d have walked away months ago. After their last whirlwind of food and fucking, but very little in the way of meaningful conversation. Then there was Dez, who he talked to every day, who he loved in a best friend, shared mind waves, god I love making music with this man sort of way. He hadn’t been kidding when he’d said he wished there was that hot spark between them, because everything else was there.
“Usually, that’s as far as I ever get,” Zakk explained. “Maybe breakfast in bed, a morning fuck and an insincere. “I’ll call you later. Sometimes from them and sometimes it’s me telling the lies.”
“But with Tripp, you were looking forward to him calling.”
“Yeah.”
“Then why don’t you turn your phone back on and answer the next time he rings you?
Chapter 4
Hangovers and Hostilities
Something was banging, or maybe it was just the Southern Comfort pounding behind his eyes. What had possessed him and Dez to kill the bottle, then call in a Wal-Mart order just so they could get more. They’d put a serious dent in that one before the words started swimming together and Dez had sprawled on his back, notebook over his face, pen clutched between his fingers until they’d gone so lax it had rolled onto the floor.
Even then Zakk had lain awake, watching him sleep, wishing to feel something, anything besides the best friend kind of love he’d formed for Dez almost from the moment they’d lain up on the roof of this place, watching the sky and talking about the song they were trying to tweak for last year’s Rocktoberfest auditions.
It was hard to believe that twelve months had passed since then. Auditions this time around had been a far easier thing to manage, their submission comprising a mix of old songs and the new ones they were readying for release. Now all that was left was the waiting.
God damnit what the fuck was banging! Why! What time was it! Who could possibly be up doing anything at…?
Cracking one eye open, Zakk realized his view consisted of the dirty clothes hamper overflowing, a section of blue painted wall, and a cord he hoped went to his alarm clock, ‘cause the only other blue room in the house was the bathroom and if he’d fallen asleep in here…rolling, he cracked the back of his hand against the hard porcelain side of the tub.
Son of a bitch, not again.
The banging grew louder, prompting Zakk to try and sit up, the room spinning even as he realized his legs were tangled in the blanket Dez must have dumped on him when he staggered in to take a piss. Holy shit, who the fuck had ordered the construction crew and why did it sound like they were dismantling an entire wall.