Amelia gripped my arm. Her warm fingers dug into my skin, and I wasn’t sure which one of us she was trying to keep in check.
“He’snottalking to her,” Nick seethed. “Forget it.”
“Just five minutes. Please. He agreed to be locked out of the world for three months in a psychiatric ward if he gets to apologise. I know you hate his fucking guts; believe me, so do I, but… Man, the methods they use in that facility will turn him back around. I know it. Please, if she doesn’t let him apologise, he’ll try to hang himself again.”
A cold shiver ran down my spine. My heart rate accelerated faster than a cheetah, introducing fear as unexpectedly as a bolt of lightning.
Hang himselfagain?
I didn’t let Nick shield me any longer. I snatched the phone from his hand and bolted it into the bathroom. I turned the lock a second before Nick’s body thumped against the door.
“Ty, it’s me,” I blurted. “What’s happening? What did he do?!”
Nick banged on the door. I pushed my back against the tiled walls between the sink and the shower.
“Girl, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry to drag you into this again, but this is the last time. I swear. It’s the last chance we have. He’s either getting admitted into a psychiatric ward, or he’ll do what it takes to die.” Ty spoke fast, as if he was running against the clock, and my heart pounded in my chest. “I guess Nick didn’t tell you, but Adrian tried to hang himself the morning you left.”
My breath flattened itself like a child trapped in a dark space.
“He’s better now…” Ty continued, unaware that his words sounded as if spoken through a bulletproof glass. “But he won’t agree to treatment unless you talk to him. There is no way of bribing the psychiatrist there. The methods they use… It has to be consensual.”
“Okay,” I said without hesitation, shattering all over again at the news of another suicide attempt. “I’ll talk to him.”
“No!” Nick yelled on the other side of the door. “Don’t do it!”
“Thank you,” Ty breathed.
His feet clapped against what sounded like a tiled floor. He was running, and Nick was throwing the weight of his body against the bathroom door. Then, the voice I knew so well sounded from the small speaker. All other sounds ceased to exist. It was just me, locked in the bathroom, andhimon the other side of the Atlantic.
“Puppet...” Adrian swallowed his own tears.
Before I knew it, my face was wet, too. I inhaled a shaky breath, slid to the floor, and pressed my back against the cold tiles under the sink.
“No, no, no,” Adrian whispered. “Don’t cry. Please, don’t cry. Baby, you shouldn’t be with me,” he uttered. “You deserve so much better than I can give you. You’re the best that happened to me, and I hate that I’m the worst that happened to you.”
“Don’t expect my forgiveness,” I whispered, covering my head with one arm. I cleared my throat, plucking up the courage to say what had to be said for the sake of his sanity and my own. “Not until you’re truly better. I know the real you, Adrian, I know the guy who was passionate about life. You still have it in you. You just need to want to be that person again, but not for me. I’m not a part of your life anymore.”
The sounds came back, and the moment of Adrian’s silence filled with Amelia’s pleas and Nick’s body thumping against the door.
Adrian inhaled, and the way he did so, was a clear sign that tears were dripping down his nose. I watched him cry more times than I cared to admit, but today I couldn’t be manipulated. I broke free from the strings he held and took a rickety, insecure step forward.
“You still care about me,” he uttered. “Why? I’ve done nothing but cause you pain, puppet. Why do you care?”
“You’ll always own a part of me, Adrian. People we encounter leave something behind. They shape us into who we are. I am who I am because you crossed my path; and I know you can pull through. You will get better for your sake, because just like me, you’re a survivor.”
The door burst open, banging against a tall, glass cabinet. Perfume bottles toppled over making a lot of noise. Nick kneeled before me, his eyes wide, chest heaving with the effort it took to break the door down.
“I love you, puppet,” Adrian whispered, and before I could say anything else, he cut the call.
I rested my face on Nick’s chest, smearing the perfect make-up over his impeccable white shirt. He didn’t mind. He drew me closer, stroking my hair while his heart pounded in his chest, not slowing down.
“Why didn’t you tell me about the suicide attempt?”
Nick helped me out from underneath the sink. “I was scared you’d go back to him.”
“I won’t. Not now, not ever again. I can’t help him. Just like no one can help me. Happiness and peace start within.”
***