“Yes,” I agree sharply. “we do.”
“Like how you’re really making the most of your twenties? I’m proud of you, doll.” Max winks. “It sounds like some fun that I need to get in on.”
Konstantin looks between us, then I see his face settle into a calm. Juliana looks at him. “I’ve been with you and Gio ... and got close to kissing Max today. Rather than hide it and make this shit more complicated, we’re talking about it ... apparently.”
16
JULIANA
Max shrugs, but I had a feeling he’d be the easiest to win over when it comes to this conversation. Konstantin considers it until Charlie whines, then he picks up the ball and tosses it again. Gio just glowers at me.
“I told you this in the restaurant, Gio.”
“Why?” He asks. “Why all of us and not just one?”
“Oh, just let the girl live.” Max snorts. “You like fun, don’t you, sport?”
Gio turns on Max. “Why? Are you afraid she wouldn’t pick you?”
Konstantin just keeps watching me. He opens his mouth, then closes it. I’ve learned he’s more private about things like his. I clear my throat. “I didn’t get to date. Ever. The second my fatherthoughtI was dating ... well it would end fast. I didn’t even get my firstrealkiss until college.”
Gio rubs the back of his neck as he considers that. Konstantin gapes at me openly. I point at him. “Daddy noticed me looking at you and what happened?”
“Reassigned.” He nods.
“And that was before it was even anoptionfor you to touch me. I haven’t gotten to experience anything and it’s not like any of us are serious.”
“I feel like you’re taking the option of getting serious away before it comes up.” Gio points out.
“Serious is overrated.” Max waves away. “You know I’m okay with it.”
I pat Max’s hand. “Thanks.”
Konstantin is still sheepish and Gio still looks mildly pissed. I take a slow breath. “Not taking away the option for any of us to get serious later on, but I don’t want to be locked down in a relationship when I could die tomorrow. I want to live life to the fullest.”
Still, no response.
“I’m not trying to convince either of you to agree to this. If you don’t like it or aren’t okay with it, I’ll understand. If you want to be with me, then be with me. Knowing everything.”
“You could have kept this a secret,” Gio whispers, rubbing his hand over his face.
“Secrets screw people over.” I shrug. “If you need time to think about it, that’s okay too.”
Max kissing my cheek gently. “You deal with Muscles and the kid. I’ll be here soon for you, doll.”
“Be safe, Max.” I bid.
He winks. “I will. I don’t want to be too damaged to satisfy you.”
Konstantin walks to me as Gio goes to the guest room and slams the door. Of course, he’s here tonight which is probably going to suck. Gio can be sulky and turns his sadness to anger easily.
Konstantin gives me puppy dog eyes. “Is there something ... lacking with me?”
“No, Kon.” I rub his chest. “You are amazing and big and ...” I shake my head, forcing myself to stay on track. “The only reasons I have are the ones I said. Granted, my mom encouraged me to play the field before she passed and I can’t exactly shake that from my head, but ...”
“But what?”
“I’m just so tired of missing out on life, Kon. I’m afraid of getting hurt. It’s the ‘what if’ thing I told you about. I’m over regretting not jumping on opportunities that make me excited. It has nothing to do with you lacking something.”