I take a deep breath and sigh before replying.
“Adam and I broke up last night,” I tell him.
“Shit. I’m sorry, Thea. I honestly thought you two were endgame.”
I smile sadly at Jude’s words. Adam and I used to joke all the time about how we’d be old and gray and sitting on the porch in our Adirondack chairs watching the sunset. It’s the typical fairy-tale ending kids wish for when they’re growing up, and we were no different. In hindsight, we were both naïve to believe it would actually happen, but it’s not uncommon for childhood sweethearts to be happily married for the rest of their lives. I guess we were both wrong when we thought we’d be one of those couples.
“So did I,” I reply. “I guess we just grew apart.”
“Is that all it was?”
Jude’s question takes me by surprise. Apart from Kyler, no one knows about Adam’s indiscretion with his colleague, and I’m sure Ky wouldn’t have discussed it with Jude.
“What do you mean?” I ask Jude, wanting him to tell me what he knows.
He sighs before responding. “Nolan told me what happened the other night. In the parking lot after the game? He said Adam was shouting and being a bit rough with you. Apparently, Millie was worried by how angry Adam was and texted Nolan to come and help. Honestly, I had planned to talk to Adam about it when we were back home but didn’t want to overstep without speaking with you first. It’s not okay for anyone to physically hurt you, Thea.”
“I know, Jude. He was just frustrated and upset by some things.” I try to reassure him. Adam and I may have broken up, but the last thing I want is for Jude’s relationship with him to be affected by it. They’re still friends, despite our relationship status.
“Don’t make excuses for him.”
“I’m not. It’s just . . . I don’t know. Adam got it in his head Kyler was some kind of threat and so was warning me off him.”
“Kyler?” Jude exclaims, disbelief in his tone. “Why the fuck would Adam have a problem with Kyler? They hardly know each other.”
I shake my head. “I wish I knew. He said Ky was at the town council meeting they had about the development Adam’s working on. It turns out it’s the same development which is making Ky’s mom homeless. Adam said Ky was disruptive at the meeting, always interrupting or whatever, and then physically assaulted Adam afterward. I asked Ky about it, and he said he didn’t touch Adam.”
I pause, trying to make my voice as steady as possible before I tell Jude the next part, the bit which really was the catalyst for mine and Adam’s break-up.
“Ky also said he saw Adam . . . with another girl. He had his hands all over her and was kissing her outside.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Jude grits out, his voice rising in anger. I shake my head again.
“I asked Adam about it, and he didn’t deny it. He said he was lonely, so what did I expect? That it’s my fault for moving.”
“JesusChrist, Thea.” Jude stands and paces in front of me with his hands on his hips. He covers his mouth with his palm and takes a breath before continuing. “Is he for real? Who the fuck does he think he is? There is no excuse for hooking-up with someone else. I swear to God, he better be grateful we’re not in the same zip code at the moment as he’d find himself best buddies with my right fist.”
“Violence doesn’t solve everything, Jude.” I chastise him in the same tone Mom would use on us. Although don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful my brother is willing to stand up for my honor.
“It does if that fucker is upsetting my sister!” Jude bellows before sitting back down on my bed, his shoulders slumping.
“It doesn’t matter now anyway,” I continue, “even I felt we were drifting apart. I was just being a fool to myself and denying it. It’s for the best. We’re better off without each other. Besides, in my heart of hearts, I don’t think I could comfortably continue being his girlfriend, knowing he’s playing a part in hurting the family of one of our friends.”
“Is that all it is?” Jude asks and I turn my head to look at him, my eyes narrowing as I try to decipher what he’s trying to say.
“What do you mean?” I question him.
“This thing with you and Kyler. You might think I don’t notice anything, but I see things, Thea. I see the looks you give each other. The way your eyes follow him when he’s in the same room and vice versa. The tension between the both of you after his fight at the bar.”
“I was just helping with his injuries is all.” I quickly answer, trying to direct Jude away from this conversation. Kyler’s his best friend, and I know he doesn’t think badly of him, but all the same, I don’t want Jude to know the extent of my feelings toward Ky. Not yet, anyway. It’s too fresh, both in relation to my breakup with Adam and with the shaky ground me and Ky are tentatively standing on. That is, if there is still some ground, after what I witnessed this morning. If I’m being honest with myself, that’s what’s playing a huge part in why I’m upset at the moment.
Jude stares at me for a while, his eyes moving back and forth between mine, and I know he’s trying to search for some hidden sign telling him there is something I’m keeping from him. Eventually, he nods and places his hand on my arm, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“Just . . . tell me if it turns into something more? Kyler’s life is complicated, and you deserve anything but. Unfortunately, I can’t help you if you keep me in the dark.”
“Okay,” I tell him, wondering at which point I should tell my brother that in my mind, it’s already turned into something more. And the “complication” I witnessed earlier today has already formed a wound in my heart.
Eighteen