I smile as I try to picture what Violet looks like underneath her clothes. And it’s good. Real good.
As far as appearances go, I’m the best-looking in our pack. I know that, and I’m guessing Violet does too. If I can keep her focused on the physical—hot sex, good food—then she might never question what I’m doing with Muldoon. And if she doesn’t question me, then nobody else will either.
And with Violet’s arrival, things are either about to get a whole lot better for me or infinitely worse.
five
VIOLET
As the days pass, I mostly keep to myself. I’m far too reactive whenever the alphas are near. Even with suppressants, my body still cries out for them. It knows what it’s meant to do, what we’re meant to be to each other.
But no. I will spend my whole life fighting this if I have to.
Once the pack believes my lie of infertility, they’ll send me to the prep school, and no alphas dare tread there. It means I’ll be safe from my biological urges, safe from the weight of any more regrettable decisions.
For now, though, it’s as if I’m a creature possessed. Even the slightest kindness from one of the alphas sends my mind and body into a tortuous battle for dominance.
I’ve already let Miles hold my hand. And I’ve spent each of the last several nights pleasuring myself with the memory of Archer and that hapless beta behind my eyelids.
The worst part is that I already know I have to let my heat come, that I must give in to them. It’s the only way to convince them to send me on to the next leg of my journey.
They won’t believe I’m infertile if we don’t even “try.” And if I act like too much of a cold fish, they could very well send me back to my mother. I have no doubts that she would then send me straight to Pack Fernando.
Honestly, death would be preferable to becoming their ratty plaything.
I just need time, time to get used to these Muldoon alphas a bit. That will make it easier to resist their charms, to prevent getting attached.
It’s on day six that I get the text message I’ve been waiting for.
Your shipment has arrived, it says, then shares the address where I can go to get it.
I take a deep breath and push my phone into my shallow jeans pocket. This is it. I’m out of time, or rather the time has come for me to show what I’m made of.
I stick a bookmark into the thriller novel I found in the den library and pad to the living room on bare feet. Surprisingly none of the alphas have set up shop on the sofa. Archer typically leaves long before I wake up, but usually one or two of the others choose to work from home in case I need anything from them during the day.
Of course, the one time I actually do need something, they’re nowhere to be found.Hmmm.
I only need to make a quick trip, and it’s one I want to keep secret from them anyway. The keys hanging on the hook by the kitchen door taunt me, and I readily give in to their suggestion.
It’s hardly a ten-minute drive. I can be there and back in a jiff.
The cold metal feels almost molten in my hand. This is a game of hot potato, and I don’t want to be the one caught holding the bomb when the music stops.
I rush outside, eager to be done with this. Why do I feel so damn guilty about taking one of their trucks out for a quick errand? This is my home now—and as far as the alphas are concerned, it’s my home forever.
The only reason they haven’t taken me around town yet is because I’ve turned them down at every opportunity. But my reaction to meeting Archer on that first day had me so freaked out that I needed to create some space to remind myself of my end goal here.
Perhaps if I break it down into smaller goals, the whole thing will feel a bit less overwhelming. Yes, I have a big task ahead of me, but right now I just need to do one simple thing—procure my birth control treatment by paying a quick visit to the shipping store.
I hop into the truck, jab the key into the ignition, and press down on the brake. It’s only then I realize that in my hurry I forgot to put on shoes.
Not my best moment.
“You’re not running away, are you?” Ben asks, sliding into the passenger side and handing me a pair of flip-flops, which I gratefully accept. He shrugs. “Sometimes I feel like running away too. But where are you going to go? At least let us show you the town before you decide to disappear into it.”
“I wasn’t…” I stop and bite my lip. Ben sees right through me. I know it. He’s far too observant, playing down his keen intelligence with silly jokes.
But I see the truth in those dark, probing eyes.