He shakes his head. “I hate that man. I hate that he was ever married to you, and I hate that he hurt you, and I fucking hate that he still shows up in your life.”
I turn and walk, my footsteps echoing against the concrete beneath my feet. Faster and faster I walk, as if I can outrun him. Or maybe I’m trying to outrun myself.
He keeps up easily. “Don’t you dare use this as an excuse to run from something good.”
I shake my head. Words won’t form, can’t form, or the heat behind my eyes will spill over. It’s so easy to see the slow resentment building, the demands, the desires. The gradual need for me to become someone else in order to be the wife he wants.
I won’t be able to do it. And I refuse to fail again, refuse to see the love in his eyes dim, and then have to watch them start to wander.
“Sophia,” he says. “Damn it, just stop.”
“Don’t call me,” I say, my footsteps speeding up. “Bye, Isaac.”
He stops following me.
27
ISAAC
Andrew rifles through his papers. He’s sitting opposite my desk, brisk competence radiating off him. “Let me see…” he mutters and pulls out a binder. “Here. The latest memo from Exciteur just arrived. They’ve refined the list of cities they suggest we start in, with more info on each, and added contact information to reputable brokerages.”
I scan the list he hands me.San Francisco, Portland,Atlanta,Dallas.“Great. Run a brief in-house analysis on the hotel market in those cities, and then start looking for properties. I want a cost analysis done on each.”
“Will do,” Andrew says. “Miss Bishop had an additional thought at our meeting earlier today. She suggested we create our own, in-house reward system for customers at the WH hotels. They’ll collect points with each stay, contributing to a free night, and it’ll also put them in the running to win a weekend staying here. At the Winter New York.”
It’s a good idea, incentivizing frequent travelers to book with us. “She suggested that, did she?”
“Yes,” Andrew says with a chuckle. “Seemed like it was off the top of her head, too. Here, these are the architect firms Exciteur has already contacted on our behalf. They’ve all worked with hotels before.”
“Excellent,” I murmur, and skim the list. Andrew is great at his job. This system undoubtedly saves me time.
But it’s painful to have him tell me this and not Sophia. That the contingency I put in there, a fail-safe, is one we actually need. And now I hate Andrew a little, for getting the chance to talk to her on a weekly basis.
After he’s finished briefing me he leaves, shutting the door behind him and closing me in with my thoughts. They turn morose. Maybe this is just how relationships go. They invariably come to this, to a bitter end, to sharp words and even sharper emotions.
What I’d had with Beverly had been empty, occasional companionship. We’d gone through the motions, but it had been hollow, a farce of the real thing. That had been exactly what I’d wanted back then. It had been what I craved after Cordelia, when relationships seemed like nothing but pain. Beverly had expected nothing from me, and I expected nothing from her, and there was no pain to be had from that.
That’s why I’d ended the occasional trysts about a year ago. The hollowness that had once felt comforting had started to grate, and the immorality of it all weighed heavier by the month. But it had never hurt.
What Sophia and I had? That was the opposite, with potential pain lurking around every goddamn corner, but only because it wasrealin a way I hadn’t experienced in years.
And now I’ve lost it.
The best woman I’ve ever met, and the best opportunity I’ll ever get. Both of them, gone in a moment.
I rest my head in my hands. It’s been seven long days since she told me to leave her alone, standing next to the East River. She’d been about to cry. I’d heard it in her voice, but she hadn’t wanted me to see it. She’d run instead.
Fuck the hotels, fuck the project, and most of all, fuck Percival Browne for winning her affection, and then abusing it, rather than honoring it. For making the most incredible woman I’ve ever met believe relationships aren’t for her. But most of all? Fuck him for still, after all that, having her affection.
I stare down at the papers spread out on my desk. The plans and names and contracts for the franchise, all drawn up by her and her team. It has her stamp all over it.
You want a wife, and I can’t be that,she’d said. Those words had haunted me over the past week. I should have been clearer about what I truly wanted, and why. That I care for her because of who she is, and not because of what she can give me down the line.
There’s a knock on my door.
“Enter!”
It’s Anthony. Walking close by his side is Abel, his guide dog. “Hi,” he says. “I’m a few minutes early.”