This is why I don’t get involved. This is why I’ve always kept up boundaries. Because someone ends up getting hurt if you don’t.
I’d just never thought that person would be me.
24
Cecilia
Victor hasn’t been himself for the past week.
He comes back late from the office, sometimes way past dinner, and goes straight to his computer. We don’t sleep in the same bed anymore, despite me trying to twice. I’d wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him desperately, passionately. He’d kissed me back for a long moment and then lowered my arms from around his neck.
“Victor?”
He’d run a thumb over my lower lip, eyes on the movement rather than meeting mine. “We’ll talk more this weekend.”
“This weekend?”
“Yes. Will you let me take you out to dinner?”
“On a date?”
“Yes.”
“I’d like that, yes.”
“Good,” he’d said, and we’d said good night right there, in the long impersonal hallway between our two bedrooms. It had been the only time this week where we’d had an actual conversation.
In some ways, he’s every bit the Victor I once knew. The one who came home and went straight to his office, who hated unnecessary small talk, who avoided emotional intimacy.
And I can only think of one reason why that’s happened.
It had started when we came home from dinner with my mother. The distance. I’d been replaying some of Mom’s words in my head in the days since, especially her thoughtless suggestion that this might become more than a fake marriage.
Victor had looked away from me when she said that, obviously pained by the suggestion. Pained because he couldn’t fathom it, or pained because he suspected it was what I now wanted?
I know he’s easy to spook, and still, I’d insisted on that damn dinner. I’d hoped it would settle my mom’s nerves and in some naive, foolish way, I wanted them to meet. Two of the people who meant the most to me. The only one missing was Nadine, but we hadn’t needed any more fuel to that fire.
It had managed to scorch us all on its own.
My phone rings and I put my headphones in before I answer. “Hi, Mom. Did you make it home okay?”
“Sure did! Had a lovely flight, too. The clouds were gorgeous. Aiyana was waiting for me at the airport and we’re on our way now.”
“To the flower festival?”
“Yes. She’s exhibiting and I’ll help.”
“You’ll have to send me some pictures of all the flowers.”
“I will. Hey, say hi to Aiyana.”
I raise my voice. “Hi Aiyana!”
A cheerful voice, slightly echoey, from the other end. “Hi, Cece baby!”
“Good luck with your exhibition!”
“Thanks, honey!”