“You can bring those beers,” I say. “Print out a few scorecards.”
“I’ve been dared by my girlfriend,” she declares, “to tell you all that—”
I groan. “Please don’t.”
But she’s laughing and shifting on the bench, her thigh coming to rest against mine. I can’t believe I’ve agreed to this, let alone suggested it. Navigating the house at dark with her there to watch. The headaches have been good for the past week, but a migraine with her there and no way to explain…
“So you have a house in Montauk,” she says, and the soft lilt of her voice brings me back. “How come?”
Oh.
The house is a test and a surrender. It’s the one inch of ground I’ve given to the diagnosis, and having purchased a place for my future self, I’ve barely spent any time there. No one knows about the house who isn’t my lawyer, accountant or assistant. They’ll all ask why I bought it. And the answer isn’t one I can speak out loud.
I need a place to live when the music ends, when the curtain falls, and the only thing remaining is darkness.
The place is gorgeous, with a view of the ocean that mocks me every single time I see it. Beautiful. And one day completely pointless. I could be living in a cave and not know it.
“As the embodiment of success,” I tell her, “of course I have a house in the Hamptons.”
Summer laughs, the sound sweeping away some of my fears. But I know they’re only waiting in the wings for their cue. This show is one I can’t stop watching, no matter how much I might want to.
14
Summer
My weekend bag slides through my fingers and hits the hardwood floor with a soft thud. “Wow,” I breathe. “This place must have cost you a fortune!”
Anthony gives a snort, turning from me to the windows that line the far wall. They open up to a patio, and beyond it, the beach beckons. Ace pads forward and does a sweep of the room, his head low and nose to the ground.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I know it’s not polite to comment on finances like that, but… wow. This house is stunning.”
“I don’t mind. To tell you the truth, it was expensive.”
“How are you not here all the time?” I run my hand over the marble kitchen counter, made with soft, rounded corners. Two giant cloud couches line the back of the room.
“Well, I have work in the city,” he says. I hear the sound of running water, a glass being filled. “So?” he finally says. “Do you like it?”
“Like it? Anthony, this house is gorgeous. Can I?”
“Go ahead.”
I open the doors to the patio. The midday sunlight is hot against my skin and a gust of wind tugs at my linen dress. “Oh my God.”
“It is nice,” he agrees, almost reluctantly.
I nudge his shoulder with mine. Well, I try to, but he’s so much taller than me that it’s his upper arm I get. “It’s gorgeous. The beach is so empty, too.”
“This part of Montauk is more secluded. People who don’t live here don’t generally come here.”
I glance through the trees to my right, but I can’t see the next property over. These oceanside villas are like entire ecosystems, existing on their own.
“You really like it here,” Anthony says. Bends down to put a hand on Ace’s flank, my dog leaning against his leg.
“Oh, yes. Who wouldn’t? Were you doubting I’d be anything but impressed?”
His lip curls into that small half-smile. “Look to the left.”
“No,” I say immediately. “You can’t have that too! It’s not allowed.”