His grimace was evident, even in the darkness.
“Adam…”
“Don’t be angry. Everyone pitched in. Liam, too. We want it to be a surprise.”
Dread infiltrated my body. “But I didn’t get anyone anything.”
Adam grasped my elbow. “We don’t expect anything, Cass. It’s really not a big deal.”
“It is to me.”
He pulled me closer. “You’ve already done so much for us. For Gramps. We didn’t expect him to ever make it to Christmas. This is our way of thanking you.”
I exhaled heavily. “He’s not here because of me, Adam. He’s here because of you, and Grayson, and Josie, and Harrison. Maybe even your dad. He doesn’t want to let go until he knows you’ll all be okay without him. I’m only easing his pain until that time comes.”
Adam’s back straightened as worry permeated through the lines on his forehead. “How much pain is he in?”
“Enough.”
He lowered his eyes before lifting them to mine. “He’s worried about me, isn’t he?”
“He just wants you to be happy.”
“I am happy.” He grasped my other arm. “When I’m here…when you’re here…”
A knot formed in my stomach. “And when I’m not?”
“Well…I thought…maybe we could…” Uncertainty rolled through his energy. “See where it goes…”
“I know where this goes from here.”
“And where’s that?”
“Outside these walls, things will be different between us. You’re a wealthy, successful business man, and I’m a widowed, single mother who…reads romance novels. We couldn’t be any more different. Too different to make it work.”
He dropped his hands. “You don’t know that.”
“Your emotions are heightened when you’re here, and you’re confusing them with something more.”
“I’m not confused, Cass. I’m… I’m… I don’t know what I am. ” His inner turmoil was evident in his pale-blue eyes. “Jesus, you’re the only person who can turn me into a bumbling idiot.”
“You’re grieving. It’s okay to feel confused.”
“Gramps isn’t dead yet.”
“But the process…the emotions…it’s already begun. Liam may have decided to stick around a little longer, but the time will come. Your feelings for me are merely a distraction until you accept it.”
“A distraction?” He ran his fingers through his hair. “Cassidy…I’ve never felt like this before.”
“Adam…please…” It took all my power to force out his energy.
“So, what am I to you, then?” His gaze darkened.
“I…I don’t know.”
“A distraction fromyourfucked-up life?”
“I have books for that,” I murmured while fighting his penetrative aura.