Callum rushed down to the great hall. He should have told Bryce to go away and stayed abed with his new bride. So why was he so eager to escape his marital bed? There was something amiss that he could not put his finger on.
He hated his infatuation, and yet he was a slave to it. Tara had laid open her beautiful body to him, and within it lay a heady release. His wife was perfection, and she belonged to him now.
Yet unease slithered into his breast. It stopped Callum in his tracks, with a pound of blood in his head. He was sure he had aroused her, that Tara accepted him willingly, even eagerly. Yet she had been so quiet and unmoving as she lay beneath him, and this morning, behind her eyes lay the haunted look of a hunted animal.
He had pursued her with single-minded determination and never stopped to think if she wanted him. He had been sure his love would be enough for both of them. Had he been an arrogant fool?
No. He had taken the right course. Tara was innocent, and their wedding rushed. It would all right itself, in time. Aye, he would go slowly, gain her trust and spoil her a little. She had been denied life’s comforts and luxuries for too long, so why not? Callum pasted a confident smile on his face and rushed into the hall.
Bryce was leaning on the mantle before the fire. He turned and glowered. ‘I hear you are wed. ‘Tis the talk of Inverness that you plucked Tara Hennaut from a whorehouse, no less, dragged her back here and forced her to wed you. What have you to say for yourself?’
Callum just shrugged. Seeing Bryce on the back foot was rather gratifying and happened all too rarely.
‘Damn you, Callum. I have to hear this from my cousin, Orla. Folk are saying Tara is with child, hence the hasty union. Am I mistaken?’
‘You shouldn’t listen to idle gossip, my friend,’ said Callum. Hardly any of that is true.’
‘And what is? Out with it. Are you wed or not?’
‘I am.’
Callum grabbed a bottle of whisky. He seated himself at the table and propped his legs up on it. This would be a lengthy interrogation, so he may as well get comfortable.
Chapter Eighteen
Callum propped himself against the bed’s headboard and watched Tara arrange her hair. He relished sweet moments like this when she raised her arms above her head to tangle her lovely golden hair into a bun. It was a morning ritual for her to do it and for him to watch.
It was not the bun that fascinated Callum, though it was a wondrous feat of twirling and pinning by her nimble fingers to accomplish it. No, it was the way Tara lifted her arms behind her head, her shift gently caressing her nipples, delicious circular shadows through the light fabric. Desire found Callum in how she arched her back, thrusting out her breasts, their silhouette so high and pert against the sun streaming in the windows. It was the way Tara bit her plump bottom lip in concentration. It was when his wife was at her loveliest, and Callum sometimes tarried, instead of going about his day, for he would not miss her ritual for the world.
On days such as these, Callum congratulated himself on being the luckiest man alive, and sometimes, despite his better judgement, he would take Tara back to bed and make that bun come tumbling down again.
Even now, he wanted to sink inside her unprotesting body and for a few brief moments, enter heaven. Yet despite her squirming and little moans when she lay under him, Tara was often far away, and Callum could never tell if her cries were of pleasure or endurance. She was always just a little detached, and the thought of it furrowed his brow.
Callum’s mood suddenly darkened. It was not enough that Tara pleased him. He wanted to please her too. He wanted to be desired, needed, longed-for – all the feelings Tara inspired in him. So, despite his iron-hard cock and the churn of lust in his loins, he rose and turned his back on temptation to get dressed.
‘I’ve a mind to go to Inverness today,’ he said over his shoulder. ‘Tis a fine spring day for a ride. Would you like to come along? I fear I have kept you, prisoner, at my pleasure for too long.’ Callum walked over to Tara and kissed her atop the head. When he placed his hands on her shoulders, he could have sworn she flinched a little.
Tara’s mouth fell open in dismay. ‘Oh, I would like to, but I have much to attend to here.’
‘You take your duties too seriously. We must all take rest now and again. And I know why you fear coming. Do not vex yourself at the gossips. Rise above them, and they will soon move on to other prey.’
‘I fear they will stare and point and speak ill of me, Callum,’ she said.
‘Anyone who does that, I will knock them flat. Cora Adler will keep her mouth shut for the coin I paid her, and as to Mistress Shaw’s part in the matter, I have had stern words with her about her lecherous husband and their cruel treatment of you.’
‘Oh, Callum, you didn’t.’
‘Tis done, and that old hag will not be spitting her poison if she knows what’s good for her own reputation. You’ve nothing to be ashamed of. So make yourself ready.’
‘Alright. I will come if you want me to,’ said Tara dutifully, turning back to her hair.
‘I want you to come because you want to,’he thought bitterly. Why must his wife always be so obedient, cast down, quiet, all the spark gone from her? What was he doing wrong?
Tara had proved to be an excellent mistress of Raigmoor. She had worked tirelessly, getting to know the servants, attending to his needs, and bringing comfort to the place. She was learning how his farms and tenants worked, what his land produced, and had organised his stores and finances, something he had long found tiresome. Indeed, since their wedding at winter’s softening into spring, Tara had made a place for herself in his life in most ways that mattered. Yet a full thaw was yet to come between them.
He had tried to make Tara comfortable, ordering huge fires to be lit so she would not feel the cold. He had sent to Inverness for dresses and shawls, tried to put meat on her bones and bring the glow back in her cheeks with the finest, heartiest food his estates could yield. There was certainly a womanly roundness to her curves these days, but the glow was still missing.
***