‘Do you think that because I am in reduced circumstances and momentarily lost my decency, you can simply buy me, like chattel, make me your property, body and soul?’
‘That is not my intention. I…I want you to be my wife. I want to give you a place in my home to protect and love you.’
‘Love? You speak of love, but we are strangers. How can I spend the rest of my life here in this awful place with a stranger?’
Callum could not have looked more anguished if she had struck him, but heedlessly Tara carried on. ‘I did not want to come into Scotland. This is not what my life is supposed to be. I did not think I could fall so low as to become a thing to be bought. I cannot accept such a fate, and I will not.’
His fists clenched. ‘And this is what you think of marriage to me? So, you will not accept me for a husband, lass.’
‘Forgive me. But the answer is no, and I will not let you or Mistress Shaw or anyone bully me into it.’
‘Bully you? I just declared my feelings to you, threw my heart down for you just to crush it,’ he snarled. ‘Am I not good enough? Is that it?’
‘A gentleman would not press me on the reason for my refusal.’
‘Well, I am no gentlemen in your eyes, so press, I will. Are you holding out for a better offer, Tara, from an English officer perhaps?’
‘I don’t know what you mean.’
‘Aye, you do. I mean Lieutenant Forster. You are infatuated with him. You like the way he flatters you, that soft English bastard.’
‘So you believe all the spiteful gossip about me, Callum, is that it?’
‘I believe the evidence of my own eyes. I know you like him. But he is gone south, to a new posting well away from here, and rumour has it he will be wed when he returns.’
‘No, you are lying.’
‘I do not lie, lass. I held off declaring myself because I could see your heart lay elsewhere.’
‘It does not, and I….’
‘But with him gone, like a love-sick fool, I thought I stood a chance. But now I see that the high and mighty Miss Tara Hennaut cannot lower herself to take a rough Scot for a husband.’
‘That is not true, and it is not fair. I mean no offence in saying no. I am not ready for marriage, to pledge myself to another for the rest of my life. We barely know each other, and I know I would never make you happy. So please do not ask me again, for my refusal is final.’
Tara stared into Callum’s angry grey eyes.‘Go and find someone better, someone worthy of your kindness and integrity. Not me. Not a broken shell who has no feeling in her heart for anything anymore, just numbness and emptiness.’
Callum stared at the floor, his jaw locked in anger or disappointment. It was impossible to tell which. At that moment, Tara was frightened of her erstwhile protector. There was just his breathing, heavy and tense, and then suddenly he headed for the door.
He paused with his back to her and said, ‘I am leaving now and I will not be coming back. But you must know that, despite everything, I wish you happy, Tara Hennaut.’ Then he barged out, almost knocking over Mistress Shaw, who had probably been eavesdropping outside.
‘Stop. Where are you going, Laird Ross?’ she wailed.
‘She refused me, so I am leaving,’ snarled Callum.
But Mistress Shaw clung to his arm. ‘No. She does not mean it. She will come to her senses. I will go back in there. I am sure she can be worked upon.’
‘I don’t want an unwilling bride. Now let go of my arm, Mistress,’ he snarled.
Tara wrapped her arms about herself to try to calm her galloping heart and sobbed. ‘I’m sorry,’ she called out, but in a heartbeat, Callum was gone, slamming the door behind him.
Mistress Shaw burst in. ‘What have you done. Stop blubbering. Tears won’t help you now. That fool was your only chance.’
‘He is not a fool, nor will I make him one by using him and lying.’
‘Selfish, wilful, Jezebel. No one else will have you, for a woman must be purer than freshly fallen snow, or she is judged as ruined. Everyone knows you have thrown yourself at Hew Gordon and that Lieutenant too, and it has all come to nought. Now, folk whisper about you behind their hands. That redcoat has quite the reputation as a rake of the first order, and now they say you have been compromised. Your insistence on living alone on that farm has not helped, and it is well known that Callum Ross has visited you there, unchaperoned as you are.’
‘No. I have done nothing wrong.’