“I think he’s doing great. I know how scared he is about being a dad, but he doesn’t need to worry. He’s nothing like Niall. If I didn’t know better, I’d say they weren’t even related because they’re that different from each other. A bit like chalk and cheese,” I mention.
“Tell me about it. Well, I definitely know you’re related to your dad.” She smirks.
“Okay, I’ll bite… why’s that?”
“Because you both belch and fart exactly the same, and when you do fart, they stink like the sewer. Your ass is disgusting.” Sarah slaps me on the ass as she walks past.
“Yeah, Daddy, your ass is disgusting,” Ethan calls out.
“Ethan, baby, don’t say stuff li
ke that… bad words, remember?” Sarah reminds him looking back at me and grimacing with a smile.
I chuckle as I make a start on dinner.
Sarah’s been off ‘the pill’ for six months, but nothing’s happened so far. It’s strange to think that Ethan was an accident nearly three years ago, and how different our lives are now. But I wouldn’t change it for the world. I love my little family.
We went to the doctor today to get all the information for Sarah and what we should be doing to increase her chance of conceiving. So, now at least, we know the right vitamins to help us along. I know she’s becoming frustrated and wants it to happen as soon as possible, but I guess it’s so precise that we have to hit at the right time in her cycle and, of course, ‘the pill’ has to be out of her system. Sarah has all these alerts going off on her phone telling us when we need to get down and dirty. Who knew it could be so challenging to get pregnant, considering how easy it was the first time. But it will happen when it’s meant to. That’s what I keep trying to tell her—it will happen eventually.
I walk into the bedroom where Sarah’s taking her pills, and she seems a little down.
“Hey, babe, what’s up?” I walk around to her side of the bed and sit next to her. She looks up at me as tears form in her eyes, so I lean in and wrap my arm around her.
“Hey, talk to me. What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?”
“I thought it would’ve happened by now. I mean, I know I have to give it time, but I guess I thought we got pregnant with Ethan so easily that I assumed it would happen right away,” she mumbles.
“Sarah, I know we both thought you’d be knocked up by now, but everything happens for a reason, babe, and you know we’ll get there. Like you said, it takes time, and we’ve got plenty of time. So, try not to get upset. This time next week, we could be laughing about it and buying baby bottles,” I say, trying to calm her.
Damn, I hate seeing her upset. It kills me. So I make the decision to go to the doctor and have my swimmers tested just in case. We know she has no trouble conceiving, so maybe it’s me who has the problem? And if it is, I want to fix it, so I can fix her. I can’t stand seeing my bright and bubbly wife like this.
After visiting the doctor for some testing, he told me that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me or my little guys. As a matter of fact, he said they’re in perfect working order, and that I had a large sperm count.
As much as that made me happy, it also concerned me because now there’s nothing I can do to help Sarah and how she’s feeling.
A year passes without any luck, but Jeni’s noticed the decline in her best friend. She spoke to me about it and even though Sarah doesn’t want anyone to know we’re trying, I had to tell Jeni and Aiden because they knew something was off, and they were worried. They both thought we were having a rough patch, and Jeni was concerned we were going to split, but that’s the farthest from the truth.
Sarah’s starting to become a defeatist about the whole baby idea. Nothing we are doing is working. Ethan is four and a half, and Sarah says once he reaches five, the age gap will be too big, and she wants us to stop trying. I can tell she really doesn’t want that, but I can understand the age gap thing. Ethan will be at school, and to have a baby in the house will distract him from his schoolwork. So, I have just over six months to knock her up.
But in the meantime, we have to go about business as normal, and today it’s Brody’s first birthday, and Sarah has organized the party. She’s finally been able to use her barnyard animals idea for one of her events. The only time she’s happy is when she’s event planning, but the bright spark that is Sarah has all but diminished. She’s still in there and pops out every now and then, but it’s rare, and I don’t know what to do to help her. I know how badly she wants another baby, and I’m starting to think that maybe I’ll have to suggest IVF, but I know how much she hates needles. She also worries about money, but if that’s what it takes to get my wife back to her fun-loving self, then I’ll work extra hard at Vinchenzo’s. I know Tony will give me more shifts if I need them.
Walking up the driveway to Aiden and Jeni’s home, I notice the child-friendly carnival theme rides out the side and the barnyard pens are all set up. Ethan’s pretty happy about coming here today as he walks up to the door holding a giant present for Brody. I ring the doorbell while Sarah fixes her dress.
“You okay?” I ask, and she looks at me and smiles.
“I’m good. Today should be fun, right, Ethan?” Sarah tousles his hair.
“Yep,” is all he replies as the door opens.
Ethan shoves the parcel toward Jeni, and she smiles and takes it. “It’s for Brody,” Ethan tells her, and he rushes in past her toward Brody in his highchair having lunch.
“Come on in. Sarah, you’ve done an amazing job with everything, as usual,” Jeni says.
“Thanks. I did what I thought my next child’s first birthday would look like,” she mumbles.
Jeni looks at me, and I shake my head. Jeni wants to tell Sarah she knows we’ve been trying, but I think it will make Sarah feel worse if she thought everyone felt sorry for her.
“Well, Aiden and I certainly appreciate it, and so does Brody. He had so much fun out there with the baby animals before you arrived,” Jeni says and leads Sarah off into the kitchen.