He gulps and hesitates. “Tokyo… I leave today.”
My heart stops and then restarts with an almighty thud.
He’s still going.
He can’t.
Not now.
Not after we’ve just gotten back together.
I shake my head slightly. “I can’t lose you. I’ve just gotten you back. We can’t spend any more time apart. You’re my lifeline, my oxygen... I need you, Aiden.”
He smirks. “Lucky I talked with Father last night while you were asleep, and he’s going with Tori, my new PA. I’ve got to say he was fucking angry, though. I’m sure he’s going to haul me over hot coals, but I don’t care.”
“Sooo not funny.” I slap him on the chest. “Tori, your new PA… she’s quite… pretty.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Tori, pretty? I’ll tell her you said that.”
I gnaw on my bottom lip. “So, tell me about her. Does she…” I pause for effect, “… have a good work ethic?”
Aiden chuckles. “Look at you digging for information. I hired her because Daniel and Killian recommended her. She’s great at her job, but she’s not you. She also bats for the other side… if you know what I mean?”
My mouth opens slightly as those words sink in. “Oh, she’s a… lesbian?”
“Yeah.” He chuckles, pulling me closer to him. “Hence, why she’ll love to know you called her pretty.”
I widen my eyes. “Oh, well, umm…”
He plants a kiss on my forehead. “I like this jealous side of you.”
I exhale, needing to talk to him seriously for a moment. “Aiden, I know I owe you some sort of explanation as to why I acted the way I did. I don’t know exactly what happened, but I need to tell you why I took everything out on you.” I lean back and gaze straight into his eyes. “When I woke… after the incident… all I could think about was why did this happen to me? I have no idea why, but for some reason, I instantly blamed you. I couldn’t stop my mind from thinking you weren’t there for me when I needed you the most… and I couldn’t get past it. But you have to know it tore me up to be away from you.”
My eyes mist up as Aiden pulls me tightly to his chest.
“I know I’ve talked about Jason a little, but there’s a lot I left out.”
Needing a moment to build up the courage to discuss this further, I pause and take a much needed, steadying breath. It’s time Aiden hears the entire extent of what happened.
“As you know, Jason was extremely controlling. Anytime I did anyt
hing he considered ‘wrong,’ he’d either verbally abuse me or he’d attack me physically.” My chest squeezes with anxiety thinking back to a time when that was my reality. “No one knew about the physical side of things. Sarah guessed, but I never really confided in her because it felt like it was my fault. If I didn’t meet his expectations…” I pause to gain strength to tell Aiden the next part, “… he would force himself on me if I didn’t want sex with him, but I let him because that’s what a good girlfriend does, right? It wasn’t until I met you that I knew what real love is.”
I turn to look into Aiden’s eyes, and just like I expect, they’re full of compassion and love.
“The time apart made me realize just how whole you make me feel. You treat me with respect and show me unconditional love. A love I had no right to push aside.”
Aiden’s body is stiff as he pays attention to me intently. He’s listening but struggling with his feelings at the same time. His hands fist against my back as he grumbles every now and then while I speak. I pull back a little. His eyes are no longer sparkling but dark and serious, his brow is furrowed, and his mouth is in a thin, straight line.
“When you came to our apartment that night, when I was… well, I was drunk. It killed me to watch you walk out our door and away from our life. I wasn’t able to get up, and I basically spent the night on the floor.” He exhales shaking his head. “Once morning came around and I’d sobered up, it really hit me that you were gone from my life forever…” He lets out a long, drawn-out sigh. “I knew there was no way for me to win you back. I could see it in the way you saw straight through me, and by the fact there was no compassion in your voice. You weren’t the Jeni I fell in love with… she was gone.” His nostrils flare. “My heart literally broke. My body stopped functioning…
“My father found me the next day. He straightened me out, fed me, and managed to get me back on my feet. He talked me into going back to work, insisting that I put my everything into it, and that it would help heal my heart.”
He stifles a laugh. “Amazingly, though, he was right. I found the only way I could function was to immerse myself wholly back into work. I spent most of my waking hours there, and I was able to function like I did before I met you.” He weakly smiles, and my heart does a double beat.
“Work was my salvation…” his smile falls, “… and my curse. I missed you so much, Jeni, more than you’ll ever know. Honestly, I thought I’d completely lost you.” He tightens his grip on me. “You’re my absolute everything, Jeni. I live and breathe you. I’ll never love another the way I love you.”
My stomach flips at his words.