Quietly, I slipped around the corner, pressing my back to the wall.
“She’s not interested in the work we do here,” Claudia said to whoever was on the other end of her cell phone. “All that woman cares about is making herself look good. She’s practically got Celeste married off to Cooper. Makes you wonder if she planted her here in hopes of setting them up.”
I went rigid.
“Apparently, he’s taking her to Winter Formal, but anyone would think it’s their engagement party. The whole thing is just gross.”
My fist clenched against my thigh but it wasn’t enough. She was going to date that asshole because he was parent-approved. Something I would never be.
A sticky trail of shame snaked through me. I would never be good enough. It was staring me right in the face, it always had been.
Pain ricocheted through my knuckles as my fist connected with the wall, but I didn’t balk, I relished it. Welcomed it into my body, my soul, letting it feed the darkness inside me.
I was an idiot for ever letting myself get tangled up with Celeste. Because she would move on.
Already had by the sounds of it.
And I’d be left to watch from the shadows as some asshole like Cooper gave her everything she deserved and more.
* * *
“You’re quiet,” Grams said as we drove home in Nix’s car.
“Just thinking.”
“About all the stupid decisions you’ve made lately?”
“Grams, come on. I said I was sorry about Leo—”
“Do not say that name in my presence. He is a criminal, Zane Thackeray. A low-life criminal who preys on people like you. And if that good boy Nate Milton hadn’t—”
“Miller,” I corrected her. “It’s Miller.”
“Milton. Miller. It doesn’t matter.” She inhaled a thin shaky breath. “I know… I know your heart is in the right place, dear. But you can’t put yourself at risk like that. Not for me. Never for me.”
“I didn’t know what else to do.” I gripped the wheel, frustration bleeding from my words.
“You could have talked to me. We could have figured it out together. You carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, dear, when a problem shared is always—”
“A problem halved,” I muttered.
She reached for my arm, laying her frail bony hand on me. “Oh, Zane Thackeray, what am I going to do with you? When your mom left… I was in a dark place for a long time. I was so unwilling to let anyone help us. To risk your heart again. I couldn’t stand the thought of someone coming into our life and hurting you. But I didn’t think…” Tears rolled down her cheeks, hitting me right in the stomach.
“It’s okay to let people in, Zane. Not everyone is out to get you.”
“I don’t need anyone, Grams. I have all I need right here.” I squeezed her hand gently.
“And Celeste? What about her? Because I know heartbreak when I see it, and that girl is hurting.”
“You saw that circus today. That’s her life, Grams. Her world. I don’t belong there.”
“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. My selfless, sweet boy.”
She didn’t say any more about it, so we rode the rest of the way in silence. Her words weighing heavily on my mind.
Once we got home, I got her inside and made sure she was comfortable.
“I’m going out,” I said, grabbing my keys. “Will you be okay for a bit?”