“I’m not you,” I bit out.
“You may not be, but you still need to talk to someone. At least, once a week.”
The walls felt as if they were closing in on me, and I struggled to suck air into my lungs.
“Mom,” Hadley said as she crossed to her. “Let’s all just take a beat.”
She was trying to help, but it was one person too many. They were all too close. I lurched to the side and took off towards the door.
“Shiloh!” my mom called.
But I just kept running. I didn’t stop until I reached Sky’s stall. I grabbed the bridle with one hand while sliding the door with the other. She opened her mouth for the bit before I even reached her. I tugged everything into place and climbed onto her, bareback.
In a matter of seconds, we were headed for the woods. I didn’t miss the sound of my name on the night air, but as soon as Sky had warmed up, I pushed her into a canter. She flew down the worn path. I didn’t have a destination in mind. I simply wanted to getaway. At the sound of the rushing creek, I steered Sky in that direction.
My lungs burned as I struggled to take in air. Each breath hurt. My hands clenched around the reins, my fingers tingling.
That sensation was just one of the warning bells. If I didn’t get myself breathing normally soon, I’d pass out.
Sky slowed as we reached the creek, and I slid off her back instantly. She hovered behind me as I took off for the water. My boots submerged in the stream, and I didn’t care in the slightest.
I bent to splash the cold water over my face. The fresh snowmelt was so frigid it startled a gasp out of me—my first real breath in minutes. I did it again and again, relishing the bite of pain against my face.
Pressure gathered behind my eyes, but I refused to let the tears fall. I’d never be free. Not completely. I was destined to live in the chains my family had woven around me in a quest to keep me safe.
I splashed more water on my face, trying to drown the pain of that realization. I was so consumed by my spiraling thoughts that I didn’t hear the hoofbeats. But the deep voice had me jolting.
“What the hell are you doing?”
6
RAMSEY
The words wereout of my mouth before I could stop them. It might’ve been spring, but the sun had disappeared, and it had to be hovering in the low forties. The stream Shiloh was standing in was pure snowmelt. She would get hypothermia.
Those light blue eyes locked with mine, and I froze. She was pale. As if all the blood had drained from her head. And those eyes were too wide, her gaze jumping at each rustle of the wind in the trees.
I slid off Rocky and strode towards Shiloh. “What happened?”
She gave her head a slight shake. “Nothing.”
“Nothingdoesn’t send someone into a freezing creek. It doesn’t drive the color from their skin.”
Shiloh’s hands clenched and flexed at her sides in a rapid rhythm. She opened her mouth to speak and then seemed to struggle to get the words out. “I-I—” She let out a growl of frustration when they wouldn’t come.
I moved to the creek’s edge. When I came within arm’s length of her, she stumbled back. I muttered a curse and took two large steps back myself. Of course, she was scared. She was alone in the woods, and I wasn’t exactly nonthreatening.
Tears glittered in Shiloh’s eyes. “Sorry.”
“I’m the one who needs to apologize. I shouldn’t have moved into your space like that.”
Her hands clenched at her sides again, knuckles going as white as her face. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just—I can’t—”
I held up a hand. “You don’t owe me any explanations.”
Shiloh’s jaw clamped tight, but she nodded. Slowly, she started for the shore. Her boots had to be soaked through, but she didn’t seem to notice. Instead, she made her way to a fallen log and sat. She hugged her knees to her chest and stared at the swirling water.
She looked so damned lost. Something about the picture she painted made my chest crack wide-open. I would’ve done anything to fix whatever was wrong.